You can do it. No, we're serious. No, we're SERIOUS. Listen to us. LISTEN. Okay? Listen. 

You can grow a plant. We believe in you.

Yes, we know that you've killed every living thing you've ever put into a pot, but don't worry, this time you can do it. And you don't have to make this harrowing journey alone! We're here to help. So grab your gardening gloves, 'cause in like three or five months, you're going to have a cucumber to eat.

Grow Some Plants, Okay?

Oh, you still rent? Cool story, BABY. Real adults buy real estate, and it's high time you learned the ins and outs of being a major property mogul. It's like being a property brother, but usually you're shorter, and not a twin. WHO'S READY?

Buy Yourself a House

We weren't sure the world needed an Adult Harder episode about coffee, but then Ryan paid $7 for a medium iced coffee, so apparently there are people who are dumb about coffee and need our help. Mostly, Ryan. This episode is for Ryan. Ryan, this is for you, are you listening? Don't pay $7 for an iced coffee.

This week's bullet points include: The history of coffee; how coffee is made; the difference between a latte, a cappuccino, and a macchiato; how to be better at coffee than Ryan is.

Coffee Like an Adult

In the epic conclusion of our inaugural two-part episode on being gainfully employed so you can buy whiskey and chips, we share some hot takes on how to not be a terrible co-worker...then we're once again joined by our friend Val, who talks about office pranks, workplace romance, how to flame out of your job in a bright, beautiful blaze of terrible, terrible glory, and more. Last week you got that job; now we aim to help you keep it.

Get a Job and Keep It, Part 2: Keep It

We don't want to brag, but we have jobs. And you can have jobs, too! This week, we're premiering the first part of our two-part episode on getting and keeping that good, good job. First up: How to make a resume that doesn't suck and how to conduct yourself in an interview, featuring our friend Val, Human Resources expert.

Get a Job and Keep It, Part 1: Get a Job

Have you ever tried to raise money for a good cause? Boy, it's hard. It's like people want to keep their own money in their own wallets because they don't know how much joy it would bring you to raise three more dollars. Well, we're here to help! This week, we talk about some of the pitfalls of fundraising, and we offer some excellently good advice on how to fundraise better.

Raise Money for a Good Cause

Mother's Day. Amiright? It's like the Saw movie franchise of holidays. Because every year or so, you think, "Oh. Wow. Is there another one of those? I forgot about that. But it's definitely there, isn't it?" And you know what? IT IS. Because Mother's Day is just relentless. AND IT WANTS TO PLAY A GAME.

This week, we go brain-deep into the problem of Mother's Day: why it's strange, why the best good sons don't get their own holiday, and what presents you should definitely NOT get your mom for her annual special day. Join us, won't you? It's a very special episode of Adult Harder.

Be Very, Very Good at Mother's Day

It's hard to not be a total jackass at a concert. If you're at the same concert as our new favorite listener, Jamie from Kansas, that is. Following Jamie's very strict orders, we explain the best way to not suck at a concert, and to be honest? We pretty much nail it.

Do Concerts Better

When someone else's wedding bells start ringing, you have just one job. JUST ONE JOB. 

Don't. F***. Things. Up. 

Unfortunately, ruining someone else’s wedding is easier than you might think. Just ask Ryan, who tried preeeeeeetty dang hard to ruin Clayton’s first wedding. NICE TRY, SMITH. 

This week is all about being a better wedding guest, and it goes way beyond not throwing up on the dance floor (though that’s an A-#1 tip).

Be a Better Wedding Guest

If you're a living person who's alive, you've probably moved at least once, and boy, you know that sh*t is the absolute worst. And it only gets harder as your friends get older and realize the economics of receiving payment in pizza and beer are some next-level nonsense. But not to worry! The Smiths have some excellent advice on how to be better at moving, without all that dumb stress.

Move Without All That Dumb Stress

Two Very Big-Time and Important college professors give weekly lessons on how to adult, covering everything from how to dress like a GD grown-up to growing your own vegetables like a boss. Strap in your ears and get ready to be adult AF.

Adult Harder

The holidays are nothing if not the perfect time to practice your latest political diatribes and hygiene-related insults. BUT ALLOW YOURSELF A MOMENT TO DREAM! What if you could go home for the holidays and NOT leave all bruised, bloodied, and emotionally broken?

This week, the Smiths tackle the tough topic of how to handle your unreasonably irrational family members, and they put their money where their mouths are by interviewing Clayton's greatest political opponent: His mom.

Face Your Family Like a Holiday Hero (UPDATED)

Ghosts are a part of a real adult's everyday life. Don't believe us? Give the Smiths a chance to change your mind. Don't believe them? Well, that's valid. But maybe Neil Tobin, Necromancer will help convince you. With Neil's help, Clayton and Ryan talk about their own experiences with ghosts (or not-ghosts, depending on where you fall on that issue), how to find ghosts, how to get rid of ghosts, and how to live with ghosts when you can't manage to make them leave.

Handle Ghosts Like a GD Boss

Boy, stress is sure awful. Not only does it cause anxiety, but, as the Smiths learned this week, it can lead to sudden and nigh-inexplicable death. Just absolute, total death. So join the guys as they dive into the wonderful world of de-stressing and share some great tips on how to relax your mind with special guest Victor Mazzeo!

De-Stress Already

[FAIR WARNING, this episode gets more explicit than most, in some really strange and surprising ways. But don't blame us. Blame our guest.]

Valentine's Day is pretty much the worst, and anyone who likes it is dumb. That said, we've got some great tips on how to be a better Valentine, and we also have a thing or two to say about the traditional V-Day practice of beating virgins with goat skins. Those Romans, man. They were into some kinky stuff. 

And hey, if you don't have a Valentine's date yet, don't worry! We talk with our good friend Lisette Medina, who has a lot of really super advice on how to use dating apps, including a lot of really super examples of why you should completely and totally avoid dating apps at all cost. Look, we'll just say it: This episode gets a little weird.

Be a Better Valentine. Or Don't. We Don't Really Care.

Look, there are a lot of seriously awful Halloween costume ideas out there. This week, with the help of Shannon Downey from Badass Cross Stitch, the Smiths navigate the landmine of bad choices, from the lame to the offensive, and throw out a few pretty great 2017 costumes ideas like a couple of GD geniuses.

Halloween Better

Culture is the sweet-ass spice of life that makes it worth living. Shakespeare said that. Or maybe it was Gandhi. Or maybe Axl Rose? Look, it doesn't matter. Culture is important, and we're diving brain-first into our new Get Some GD Culture series with a look at the business of show. It's time to get theater-y AF.

Get Some GD Culture

Some people think decorating for the holidays is easy, and that's absolutely correct. Tape some Christmas lights to your couch, and you're all set! Well, that's what the Professors Smith thought, anyway. But then Hollis Scarborough of Silvercreek Creative came along and blew their minds to Christmas pieces. She shares her next-level holiday decorating tips this week, and the Smiths add a few of their own ideas, and, spoiler alert: They're amazing, and VERY smart.

Decorate for the Holidays Like a Serious Real Person

The decision to become a parent is a big one. There's a lot to consider, like "Will I cause accidental and irreparable lifelong harm to the emotional state of a real human person?" The Smiths grapple with the challenges and rewards of having babies, along with the help of a very special guest, professional father and podcaster Travis McElroy!

Bear and Raise Children Without Causing Irreparable Harm

Massages are supposed to be relaxing...so why do they give us so much anxiety? This week, the Smiths take on the many discomforts of getting naked with a stranger and saying, "Put your hands all over me." They teach you how to overcome any massage-related issue, and they've got some pretty good advice about saunas, too.

Get a Massage, and Don't be Weird About It

We got a letter from a listener who wanted to know just how scared he should be about getting his first solo credit card. And boy, did we run with that. In this episode, we talk credit scores, smart strategies for paying down huge debt, and how to get credit card companies to pay YOU! We don't want to brag, but it's a severely adult-ish episode.

Handle Credit Card Debt Like a Brave Hero

Look, let's face it: Communication is hard. And it's not made any easier by the fact that digital platforms give us a pretty good GD excuse to say things to people without having to actually talk to them. But it's important to know how to communicate well, because poor communication is the root of fights, and of poor work evaluations, which is a VERY grown-up thing to be worried about. This week, author and teacher Ben Tanzer joins the Smiths and helps them crack the code on how to communicate like a serious person.

Communicate with Laser-Like Focus

You know who loves pets? Literally everyone. You know who doesn't love pets? Sociopaths, which we understand does detract from our statement about everyone loving pets, but it's important to not always split hairs. This week, the Professors Smith discuss the importance of pets, and then they rank the best and worst pets ever, because they're professionals like that.

Get a Pet, Okay?

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