We live in a culture that prizes youth and tells us that, once our wild 20s are over, we're basically on the slow train to decay and death. But modern science tells us otherwise, as we set out to explore in this episode. Given the cultural narrative of decline and fall, do we even have a sense of what the stages of life are beyond child–teenager–worker–pensioner–dead? New research suggests that there are seven distinct 'primes of life', each with their own strengths, which call into question the narrative of inescapable decay. We look at what we gain as well as what we lose as our years increase – but not without questioning how the scientists came to these conclusions! The studies prompt us to ask what we should prioritise at different stages of our life – when's the time to go all-out, to study something deeply, or to be hitting the gym on the regular? The story of our physical and psychological development is complex and sometimes paradoxical. But beyond the science of it all, how can (and how should) we conceptualise all this so we can say we've led a Good Life? We dig into:  the different strengths we gain as we grow older the power of myth to make sense of and value our different primes what we actually lose and gain how Jungian Psychology can reframe our dismissive, mocking attitude to having a 'midlife crisis'  Jon riffs on what Carl Jung called the 'Individuation Process', the ancient concepts of the Daimon and the Genius, and we ask how these theories can help us to grow and become who we truly are. LINK: The scientist whose creativity was unleashed after having a stroke is Dr Jill Bolte Taylor. Check out her TED talk here. Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

We live in a culture that prizes youth and tells us that, once our wild 20s are over, we're basically on the slow train to decay and death. But modern science tells us otherwise, as we set out to explore in this episode. Given the cultural narrative of decline and fall, do we even have a sense of what the stages of life are beyond child–teenager–worker–pensioner–dead? New research suggests that there are seven distinct 'primes of life', each with their own strengths, which call into question the narrative of inescapable decay. We look at what we gain as well as what we lose as our years increase – but not without questioning how the scientists came to these conclusions! The studies prompt us to ask what we should prioritise at different stages of our life – when's the time to go all-out, to study something deeply, or to be hitting the gym on the regular? The story of our physical and psychological development is complex and sometimes paradoxical. But beyond the science of it all, how can (and how should) we conceptualise all this so we can say we've led a Good Life? We dig into: <ul> <li>the different strengths we gain as we grow older</li> <li>the power of myth to make sense of and value our different primes</li> <li>what we actually lose and gain</li> <li>how Jungian Psychology can reframe our dismissive, mocking attitude to having a 'midlife crisis'</li> </ul> Jon riffs on what Carl Jung called the 'Individuation Process', the ancient concepts of the Daimon and the Genius, and we ask how these theories can help us to grow and become who we truly are. LINK: The scientist whose creativity was unleashed after having a stroke is Dr Jill Bolte Taylor. Check out her TED talk <a href="https://youtu.be/UyyjU8fzEYU" rel="noreferrer noopener nofollow" target="_blank">here</a>. Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

The 7 Primes of Life

Jon’s been getting disturbing dispatches from Andrea. Is the economy about to crash like never before? Was 2008’s Big Short just a dress rehearsal for an incoming apocalypse that will shred the stock market and rewrite the future of society? More importantly, should we all be investing in GameStop? Well, perhaps. Andrea’s been going incredibly deep into this very confusing world and he’s back to fill the rest of us in. Jon’s not convinced the end is nigh, but there’s definitely something disturbing going on in the financial heart of our ‘civilisation’. Whatever happens next, we need to arm ourselves with better information and think about the kind of society we’d want to build in the prospective ruins of the current world order. Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

Jon’s been getting disturbing dispatches from Andrea. Is the economy about to crash like never before? Was 2008’s Big Short just a dress rehearsal for an incoming apocalypse that will shred the stock market and rewrite the future of society? More importantly, should we all be investing in GameStop? Well, perhaps. Andrea’s been going incredibly deep into this very confusing world and he’s back to fill the rest of us in. Jon’s not convinced the end is nigh, but there’s definitely something disturbing going on in the financial heart of our ‘civilisation’. Whatever happens next, we need to arm ourselves with better information and think about the kind of society we’d want to build in the prospective ruins of the current world order. Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

(Economic) Apocalypse Now – Are We Weeks Away From Global Financial Meltdown?

Andrea returns for a live, YouTube-streamed episode as we finally get back in the recording saddle! And we're back with anger. Or at least, a certain kind of anger: the channelled variety which Andrea says is essential to making a true connection with and impact on the outside world. We've decided to shake things up a bit, so we're putting aside our coverage of 'The Laws of Human Nature' and, starting with this episode, will be focusing on issues that fire us up and which need to be talked about. What better place to start than a global conspiracy that continues to put the blame and responsibility for global warming and natural destruction on the shoulders of individuals rather than the true culprits... No, this isn't a 5G conspiracy – it's much worse than that... Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

Andrea returns for a live, YouTube-streamed episode as we finally get back in the recording saddle! And we're back with anger. Or at least, a certain kind of anger: the channelled variety which Andrea says is essential to making a true connection with and impact on the outside world. We've decided to shake things up a bit, so we're putting aside our coverage of 'The Laws of Human Nature' and, starting with this episode, will be focusing on issues that fire us up and which need to be talked about. What better place to start than a global conspiracy that continues to put the blame and responsibility for global warming and natural destruction on the shoulders of individuals rather than the true culprits... No, this isn't a 5G conspiracy – it's much worse than that... Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

Righteous Anger – A New Beginning?

This episode is an experiment. Jon turns on the mic for a solo cast – to reflect on what life in the pandemic means and the challenges of finding meaning and direction in a world where it feels impossible to plan for the future. We've also go an update for you on the state of the podcast, and Jon's inviting you to get in touch with him via his websiteto offer some feedback, questions, and prompts for future episodes like this. Jon then shares an article he wrote for the Los Angeles Review of Books which was published a few months ago: The Conspiracy on Pushkin Street: The Costs of Humour in the USSR. The piece reveals the long-lost story of five students who found themselves sentenced to the Gulag just for telling jokes and chewing the fat in their dormitory... it's a tragic tale which you'll see has more than a few unsettling parallels with modern-day Cancel Culture. Thanks for listening – we appreciate you. Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

This episode is an experiment. Jon turns on the mic for a solo cast – to reflect on what life in the pandemic means and the challenges of finding meaning and direction in a world where it feels impossible to plan for the future. We've also go an update for you on the state of the podcast, and Jon's inviting you to get in touch with him <a href="https://jonwaterlow.com/" rel="noreferrer noopener nofollow" target="_blank">via his website</a>to offer some feedback, questions, and prompts for future episodes like this. Jon then shares an article he wrote for the Los Angeles Review of Books which was published a few months ago: <a href="https://lareviewofbooks.org/article/the-conspiracy-on-pushkin-street-the-costs-of-humor-in-the-ussr/" rel="noreferrer noopener nofollow" target="_blank">The Conspiracy on Pushkin Street: The Costs of Humour in the USSR</a>. The piece reveals the long-lost story of five students who found themselves sentenced to the Gulag just for telling jokes and chewing the fat in their dormitory... it's a tragic tale which you'll see has more than a few unsettling parallels with modern-day Cancel Culture. Thanks for listening – we appreciate you. Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

Solo Cast & The Conspiracy on Pushkin Street

Michael Garfield

Here's a hidden treasure from the VITD archives for you – our interview with the brilliant and fascinating Michael Garfield! Michael's the host of the Future Fossils podcast, an artist, musician, and a 'sense-maker' of what it means to be having this strange human experience. We spoke to Michael some years ago and for reasons lost to history the episode got mislaid but has now resurfaced! So, not a whisper of Covid to be found, and Jon and Andrea might sound rather chirpier than they have during 2020 – both of which are distinct selling points for the episode. Listening back in the editing room has been a treat that's alternately mind-melting and mind-expanding. Michael brings his unique perspective as a futurist-palaeontologist to bear on the human condition, on what he calls 'a quest to be better ancestors'. In our chat, we dig into Big Questions: What even is reality? If we could truly grasp all its multiple layers, would we even want to, or would it simply drive us insane? Do we have souls and, if so, can they be cloned? And why is Richard Dawkins such a dick? Andrea shares what happened when he dropped acid and watched the whole of Altered Carbon – what do that show's ideas of 'the virtual' have to teach us about our inherently subjective perspective on, well, everything? We also talk Westworld, free will, where fantasies come from, and what it means to be insane. Frankly, there's no way to summarise the richness of this episode, so hit play and discover it all for yourself! Connect with Michael  Michael's Patreon Page The Future Fossils podcast  Get In Touch!  Discuss the episode over on our Facebook Discussion Group And you can find us on Instagram and Twitter Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world  Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

Here's a hidden treasure from the VITD archives for you – our interview with the brilliant and fascinating Michael Garfield! Michael's the host of the <a href="https://shows.acast.com/futurefossils" rel="noopener nofollow" target="_blank">Future Fossils</a> podcast, an artist, musician, and a 'sense-maker' of what it means to be having this strange human experience. We spoke to Michael some years ago and for reasons lost to history the episode got mislaid but has now resurfaced! So, not a whisper of Covid to be found, and Jon and Andrea might sound rather chirpier than they have during 2020 – both of which are distinct selling points for the episode. Listening back in the editing room has been a treat that's alternately mind-melting and mind-expanding. Michael brings his unique perspective as a futurist-palaeontologist to bear on the human condition, on what he calls 'a quest to be better ancestors'. In our chat, we dig into Big Questions: What even is reality? If we could truly grasp all its multiple layers, would we even want to, or would it simply drive us insane? Do we have souls and, if so, can they be cloned? And why is Richard Dawkins such a dick? Andrea shares what happened when he dropped acid and watched the whole of Altered Carbon – what do that show's ideas of 'the virtual' have to teach us about our inherently subjective perspective on, well, everything? We also talk Westworld, free will, where fantasies come from, and what it means to be insane. Frankly, there's no way to summarise the richness of this episode, so hit play and discover it all for yourself! Connect with Michael <ul> <li>Michael's <a href="https://www.patreon.com/michaelgarfield" rel="noopener nofollow" target="_blank">Patreon Page</a></li> <li>The <a href="https://shows.acast.com/futurefossils" rel="noopener nofollow" target="_blank">Future Fossils</a> podcast</li> </ul> Get In Touch! <ul> <li>Discuss the episode over on our <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/207829843133347/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Facebook Discussion Group</a></li> <li>And you can find us on <a href="https://www.instagram.com/vinthed.pod/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="https://twitter.com/vinthed" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Twitter</a></li> <li>Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world</li> </ul> Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

Are You Conscious? Westworld, Neuroscience, And Living In The Virtual – With Special Guest Michael Garfield

Envy is an inescapable part of the human experience. But nobody likes to feel – let alone admit to – envy. Instead, whenever we feel the stirrings of the green serpent, we rapidly turn the feeling outwards, projecting that gut churning insecurity onto the object of our desire. So, we're not envious – that person just got lucky; they knew the right people; their stuff isn't even that good! And on and on it goes, because we'd rather demolish someone else than pause for even a moment to admit that we actually feel inferior, weak and vulnerable. This episode quickly becomes very personal. Jon and Andrea put each other in the hot seat by revealing which envious tendencies they've detected in each other. The results are uncomfortable to say the least. And what about the dangers of provoking envy in others? They're not going to admit to that emotion either, so we need to learn to look beneath the surface in order to root out their true feelings. Learning to read microexpressions is just one to break the envy code. Robert counsels us against gossiping and badmouthing other people because this is often simply a mask for envy. But this troubles us. Is it really so bad to have some fun by badmouthing people we don't like? Does envy always lie just beneath the surface when we do this? Ultimately, giving everyone else the 'benefit of the doubt' without ever revising our opinions based on their actions is a one-way ticket to getting walked all over. Some people are simply assholes, and the most toxic among us have generally become highly adept at concealing it. The real lesson here is not that we should all try to be angels constantly beating ourselves up for feeling envy, but to become expert at understanding our own emotions. Is it envy we're projecting outwards into mean-spirited feelings, or, if we look closely, are these negative emotions justified by the actions of our target? This is delicate internal work, and we dig deep in this episode to understand the nuances between boundaries, envy, gossip, and just having some fun.   Also Including:  The envious underbelly of Frankenstein's Mary Shelley First impressions and how to weaponise them Drag queens and envy The spectre of Brian Rose In our society, are dreams only for the talented?  Get In Touch!  Discuss the episode over on our Facebook Discussion Group And you can find us on Instagram and Twitter Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world  Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

Envy is an inescapable part of the human experience. But nobody likes to feel – let alone admit to – envy. Instead, whenever we feel the stirrings of the green serpent, we rapidly turn the feeling outwards, projecting that gut churning insecurity onto the object of our desire. So, we're not envious – that person just got lucky; they knew the right people; their stuff isn't even that good! And on and on it goes, because we'd rather demolish someone else than pause for even a moment to admit that we actually feel inferior, weak and vulnerable. This episode quickly becomes very personal. Jon and Andrea put each other in the hot seat by revealing which envious tendencies they've detected in each other. The results are uncomfortable to say the least. And what about the dangers of provoking envy in others? They're not going to admit to that emotion either, so we need to learn to look beneath the surface in order to root out their true feelings. Learning to read microexpressions is just one to break the envy code. Robert counsels us against gossiping and badmouthing other people because this is often simply a mask for envy. But this troubles us. Is it really so bad to have some fun by badmouthing people we don't like? Does envy always lie just beneath the surface when we do this? Ultimately, giving everyone else the 'benefit of the doubt' without ever revising our opinions based on their actions is a one-way ticket to getting walked all over. Some people are simply assholes, and the most toxic among us have generally become highly adept at concealing it. The real lesson here is not that we should all try to be angels constantly beating ourselves up for feeling envy, but to become expert at understanding our own emotions. Is it envy we're projecting outwards into mean-spirited feelings, or, if we look closely, are these negative emotions justified by the actions of our target? This is delicate internal work, and we dig deep in this episode to understand the nuances between boundaries, envy, gossip, and just having some fun.   Also Including: <ul> <li>The envious underbelly of Frankenstein's Mary Shelley</li> <li>First impressions and how to weaponise them</li> <li>Drag queens and envy</li> <li>The spectre of Brian Rose</li> <li>In our society, are dreams only for the talented?</li> </ul> Get In Touch! <ul> <li>Discuss the episode over on our <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/207829843133347/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Facebook Discussion Group</a></li> <li>And you can find us on <a href="https://www.instagram.com/vinthed.pod/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="https://twitter.com/vinthed" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Twitter</a></li> <li>Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world</li> </ul> Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

The Laws of Human Nature 12: Poison Envy

Maybe you've heard of the shadow? Even if you haven't, you've got one – and there's no escaping it. This episode, we discuss how to discover it, accept it, and stop being driven by negative emotions you don't consciously understand. Carl Jung's idea of the shadow side of the personality is fascinating, vital, and compelling. But it's usually presented in an incredibly complex way – thankfully Robert has made it super accessible, and we're here to break down what it means for all of us today. As we grow up, we're rewarded for certain kinds of behaviour and punished for others. We learn, as children and young adults, to edit ourselves so that we feel loved and accepted. The result is that we start to disown and shut away aspects of ourselves – locking them in the closet and pretending they don't exist. But they do... and sometimes they seize control. The shadow takes over. 'Something came over me!' people exclaim – but that's not true at all. Something came out of them. The shadow speaks, particularly at moments of anger, fear, and stress. Andrea warns that we have to take these emotional outbursts seriously. When people show you who they are – believe them. It doesn't mean that they are only their shadow, but if someone tells you 'you'd be nothing without me!', that came from a real (if usually hidden) place. This isn't just about losing your temper. It's also about how we unconsciously shape ourselves in a way to get our secret, shadowy needs met. If, deep down, we want to be cared for, we can become control freaks until we burn ourselves out and people have to look after us. Or if we feel attracted to members of the same sex, we can become virulently homophobic. Hidden behind these powerful emotions is something else, trying to find expression. Repression doesn't win: it only creates an opposing force which tries to burst its way out of the closet to finally get what it wants. The shadow cannot be escaped – it has to be consciously integrated. You can't make it other people's problems without trashing your relationships and living in a state of repression and denial. And that's exhausting – so exhausting that you won't have anything left over to live the rest of your life. To get anywhere with this psychological enquiry, we have to make sure we ground it in real life examples. Robert offers us the story of Richard Nixon, but we also throw ourselves under the bus, along with Trump, the Tiger King, and a guy who decided to trash Andrea's apartment. Also Including:  What if Nixon had been loved? Do autistic people have a shadow – or are they living their shadow? Making sense of emotional outbursts Homophobia and the shadow The psychology of politics (and Donald Trump) Stop being aggressively unique!  Get In Touch!  Discuss the episode over on our Facebook Discussion Group And you can find us on Instagram and Twitter Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world  Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

Maybe you've heard of the shadow? Even if you haven't, you've got one – and there's no escaping it. This episode, we discuss how to discover it, accept it, and stop being driven by negative emotions you don't consciously understand. Carl Jung's idea of the shadow side of the personality is fascinating, vital, and compelling. But it's usually presented in an incredibly complex way – thankfully Robert has made it super accessible, and we're here to break down what it means for all of us today. As we grow up, we're rewarded for certain kinds of behaviour and punished for others. We learn, as children and young adults, to edit ourselves so that we feel loved and accepted. The result is that we start to disown and shut away aspects of ourselves – locking them in the closet and pretending they don't exist. But they do... and sometimes they seize control. The shadow takes over. 'Something came over me!' people exclaim – but that's not true at all. Something came out of them. The shadow speaks, particularly at moments of anger, fear, and stress. Andrea warns that we have to take these emotional outbursts seriously. When people show you who they are – believe them. It doesn't mean that they are only their shadow, but if someone tells you 'you'd be nothing without me!', that came from a real (if usually hidden) place. This isn't just about losing your temper. It's also about how we unconsciously shape ourselves in a way to get our secret, shadowy needs met. If, deep down, we want to be cared for, we can become control freaks until we burn ourselves out and people have to look after us. Or if we feel attracted to members of the same sex, we can become virulently homophobic. Hidden behind these powerful emotions is something else, trying to find expression. Repression doesn't win: it only creates an opposing force which tries to burst its way out of the closet to finally get what it wants. The shadow cannot be escaped – it has to be consciously integrated. You can't make it other people's problems without trashing your relationships and living in a state of repression and denial. And that's exhausting – so exhausting that you won't have anything left over to live the rest of your life. To get anywhere with this psychological enquiry, we have to make sure we ground it in real life examples. Robert offers us the story of Richard Nixon, but we also throw ourselves under the bus, along with Trump, the Tiger King, and a guy who decided to trash Andrea's apartment. Also Including: <ul> <li>What if Nixon had been loved?</li> <li>Do autistic people have a shadow – or are they living their shadow?</li> <li>Making sense of emotional outbursts</li> <li>Homophobia and the shadow</li> <li>The psychology of politics (and Donald Trump)</li> <li>Stop being aggressively unique!</li> </ul> Get In Touch! <ul> <li>Discuss the episode over on our <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/207829843133347/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Facebook Discussion Group</a></li> <li>And you can find us on <a href="https://www.instagram.com/vinthed.pod/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="https://twitter.com/vinthed" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Twitter</a></li> <li>Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world</li> </ul> Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

The Laws of Human Nature 11: Discovering the Shadow

Time to escape the mind prison. This episode is like a shot of distilled Stoicism... are you ready? Tapping into our true nature and living a good life often comes down to breaking the cycle – to escape the common fate of becoming just an echo of an echo of all the mistakes that came before you, be it in your family or your community. If we don't break free, we end up repeating the same patterns and simply becoming a victim of our birth. This often plays out in what we might call The Drama Triangle, where we alternate between the roles of the Hero, the Victim and the Villain. It doesn't matter which role you play – the life you'll be leading is one of unnecessary and harmful drama. One of the ways to break free, Robert tells us, is to forgive others. But we question this – is it essential to forgive the people who've done you wrong, or is there a middle way that's more of a letting go and moving on? The world is inherently chaotic and over the years we start building defences to try to protect ourselves. We impose shapes and patterns through our beliefs about the world and about ourselves. Over time, these become ossified and unbending, and we close ourselves off from the great richness and variety of life. But we can overcome this fearful tendency. We can catch ourselves when we get stuck in fixed beliefs and intentionally restore the fluidity of attitude which brings ourselves and our world alive. The most important aspect of this is learning to let go of the need to be right and instead experiment with actually being happy in a world which we do not and cannot control. As we explore, our experience is inherently subjective and, as such, is in our hands. Robert calls on Carl Jung to help us navigate this reality with skill and awareness and thereby avoid becoming trapped in our own, unconsciously-constructed mind prisons. Robert provides us with tools to escape the mind prisons of anxiety, depression, and resentment (and Jon in particular shares his own struggles with these). If we don't do the work, we'll remain in prison. Free will probably exists – but it's really, really hard. We have to put in the work or otherwise resign ourselves to a life that rolls along the tracks laid out for us by habit, inheritance and fear.   Also Including:  How to Chekhov yourself Debbie Downers and Negative Nancies The Japanese Consulate's emergency helpline for tourists in Paris Finding who you really are by trying out different personas Normal-speed montages  Get In Touch!  Discuss the episode over on our Facebook Discussion Group And you can find us on Instagram and Twitter Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world  Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

Time to escape the mind prison. This episode is like a shot of distilled Stoicism... are you ready? Tapping into our true nature and living a good life often comes down to breaking the cycle – to escape the common fate of becoming just an echo of an echo of all the mistakes that came before you, be it in your family or your community. If we don't break free, we end up repeating the same patterns and simply becoming a victim of our birth. This often plays out in what we might call The Drama Triangle, where we alternate between the roles of the Hero, the Victim and the Villain. It doesn't matter which role you play – the life you'll be leading is one of unnecessary and harmful drama. One of the ways to break free, Robert tells us, is to forgive others. But we question this – is it essential to forgive the people who've done you wrong, or is there a middle way that's more of a letting go and moving on? The world is inherently chaotic and over the years we start building defences to try to protect ourselves. We impose shapes and patterns through our beliefs about the world and about ourselves. Over time, these become ossified and unbending, and we close ourselves off from the great richness and variety of life. But we can overcome this fearful tendency. We can catch ourselves when we get stuck in fixed beliefs and intentionally restore the fluidity of attitude which brings ourselves and our world alive. The most important aspect of this is learning to let go of the need to be right and instead experiment with actually being happy in a world which we do not and cannot control. As we explore, our experience is inherently subjective and, as such, is in our hands. Robert calls on Carl Jung to help us navigate this reality with skill and awareness and thereby avoid becoming trapped in our own, unconsciously-constructed mind prisons. Robert provides us with tools to escape the mind prisons of anxiety, depression, and resentment (and Jon in particular shares his own struggles with these). If we don't do the work, we'll remain in prison. Free will probably exists – but it's really, really hard. We have to put in the work or otherwise resign ourselves to a life that rolls along the tracks laid out for us by habit, inheritance and fear.   Also Including: <ul> <li>How to Chekhov yourself</li> <li>Debbie Downers and Negative Nancies</li> <li>The Japanese Consulate's emergency helpline for tourists in Paris</li> <li>Finding who you really are by trying out different personas</li> <li>Normal-speed montages</li> </ul> Get In Touch! <ul> <li>Discuss the episode over on our <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/207829843133347/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Facebook Discussion Group</a></li> <li>And you can find us on <a href="https://www.instagram.com/vinthed.pod/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="https://twitter.com/vinthed" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Twitter</a></li> <li>Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world</li> </ul> Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

The Laws of Human Nature 10: The Attitude Adjustment

This is our second episode exploring The Law of Defensiveness, but this time we're breaking it down into some clear steps on how to hone our ability to interact and work with other people! Robert has five key strategies, some of which we dig, some of which we think need some careful reflection before we put them into practice. Becoming a Deep Listener is a great place to start – by listening to others and getting out of your own head and internal narrative, we can learn so much more about the person across from us. When we pay real attention to what lights someone up and what makes them anxious, we're able to shape our reactions appropriately, enriching the conversation and even forging a lasting relationship. Jon brings up his experience of studying a 'negotiation' course. We dig into the 'Mirror Technique' and how to use it without sounding like a malfunctioning robot. Another key technique is to proactively shape the mood of every interaction you have. This isn't rocket science, and yet we so often neglect to do it. If we take the time to bring the right energy to a situation, we can match speeds with other people and truly connect with them. When we try to speak to their best selves, we pay them implicit compliments and give them a judgement-free space to really come out of their defensive shell. Still, encouragement can be a delicate affair – we can be so prickly when it comes to critical feedback, but without it, we end up living a life of dangerous delusion. Confirming other people's self-opinion is a vital skill, but we need to be very careful not to chug down flattery and get drunk on compliments at the expense of reality. Another key principle is not to make other people feel beholden to you. As we explain, the counterintuitive trick to getting help is not to remind others that they owe you one, but instead to remind them of all they've done for you in the past. And, perhaps most important of all, we must carefully allay other people's insecurities by being sensitive to where they lack confidence. Instead, we can learn to praise their deliberate choices, valuing the work and effort they've made, rather than vaguely saying they have 'talent'. Telling Adele she's a great singer means nothing to her; complimenting her for the incredible nuance of her songwriting or emotional delivery, on the other hand, are far more meaningful contributions. Remember, this isn't about manipulation – this is about being a better human. If we could sum this up in a simple mantra, it would be: Don't manipulate people – invest in your relationships. Dividends will follow, but only if the investment is real. Also Including:  The Conversation D-Pad – check it out here Providing the right kind of encouragement at the right moment Painting fences the Tom Sawyer way Doing a bad job... strategically Gifts that aren't gifts The decline of Jordan Peterson  Get In Touch!  Discuss the episode over on our Facebook Discussion Group And you can find us on Instagram and Twitter Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world  Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

This is our second episode exploring The Law of Defensiveness, but this time we're breaking it down into some clear steps on how to hone our ability to interact and work with other people! Robert has five key strategies, some of which we dig, some of which we think need some careful reflection before we put them into practice. Becoming a Deep Listener is a great place to start – by listening to others and getting out of your own head and internal narrative, we can learn so much more about the person across from us. When we pay real attention to what lights someone up and what makes them anxious, we're able to shape our reactions appropriately, enriching the conversation and even forging a lasting relationship. Jon brings up his experience of studying a 'negotiation' course. We dig into the 'Mirror Technique' and how to use it without sounding like a malfunctioning robot. Another key technique is to proactively shape the mood of every interaction you have. This isn't rocket science, and yet we so often neglect to do it. If we take the time to bring the right energy to a situation, we can match speeds with other people and truly connect with them. When we try to speak to their best selves, we pay them implicit compliments and give them a judgement-free space to really come out of their defensive shell. Still, encouragement can be a delicate affair – we can be so prickly when it comes to critical feedback, but without it, we end up living a life of dangerous delusion. Confirming other people's self-opinion is a vital skill, but we need to be very careful not to chug down flattery and get drunk on compliments at the expense of reality. Another key principle is not to make other people feel beholden to you. As we explain, the counterintuitive trick to getting help is not to remind others that they owe you one, but instead to remind them of all they've done for you in the past. And, perhaps most important of all, we must carefully allay other people's insecurities by being sensitive to where they lack confidence. Instead, we can learn to praise their deliberate choices, valuing the work and effort they've made, rather than vaguely saying they have 'talent'. Telling Adele she's a great singer means nothing to her; complimenting her for the incredible nuance of her songwriting or emotional delivery, on the other hand, are far more meaningful contributions. Remember, this isn't about manipulation – this is about being a better human. If we could sum this up in a simple mantra, it would be: Don't manipulate people – invest in your relationships. Dividends will follow, but only if the investment is real. Also Including: <ul> <li>The Conversation D-Pad – check it out <a href="https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3748619" rel="noreferrer noopener nofollow" target="_blank">here</a></li> <li>Providing the right kind of encouragement at the right moment</li> <li>Painting fences the Tom Sawyer way</li> <li>Doing a bad job... strategically</li> <li>Gifts that aren't gifts</li> <li>The decline of Jordan Peterson</li> </ul> Get In Touch! <ul> <li>Discuss the episode over on our <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/207829843133347/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Facebook Discussion Group</a></li> <li>And you can find us on <a href="https://www.instagram.com/vinthed.pod/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="https://twitter.com/vinthed" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Twitter</a></li> <li>Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world</li> </ul> Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

The Laws of Human Nature 9: Five Strategies To Become a Master Persuader

This could be the most important Law of all: The Law of Defensiveness. At our emotional core, we're all desperately grasping onto three basic ideas – the sense that we're independent; that we are intelligent in our own way; and that we are, overall, a good and decent person. It doesn't matter that a lot of the time this isn't true – these ideas remain the cornerstones of our sense of self and we'll defend them to the last. Knowing this and learning how to manoeuvre our way around other people's internal narratives, we can finally begin to exert influence on the world around us. Robert takes the example of the rise of Lyndon Johnson. This prickly and driven young man was going nowhere fast in US politics, but once he learnt how to validate and play to other people's emotional needs, his ascent was nothing short of astonishing. What Johnson's story reveals is that effectiveness and influence isn't about having particular skills, abilities, or even about paying your dues. It's about making other people feel good around and about you. Robert reveals several key strategies to achieve this. First, we must play the role of the student: we must ask other people's opinions and advice, putting them at their ease and allowing them to feel seen and heard. So often we go through life trying to charm people with our own ideas, but this frequently backfires. When we stop talking about ourselves and what we think, we tune ourselves to other people's wisdom, experience and interests, opening the doors to deeper connection and ever greater possibilities. Most people also crave validation so badly that they can rarely turn it down. Once you become a source of that sweet nectar, you'll rarely have to ask for anything – they will want to do it for you. This rapidly starts to feel creepy and manipulative – but why? Jon and Andrea examine this disgust reflex because, when we look closely, this is how human relations work... we just spend a lot of our time ignoring it. Still, the ethics are confusing here. Are we merely making an unconscious habit into a conscious strategy, or are we lying in order to get what we want? Is this about finding ways to use people, or finding ways to connect and collaborate? Ultimately, this Law is about practical empathy and learning to put our egos on hold. Instead of building walls around ourselves, it's about going outside to explore the world and the people around us. It's also about the lessons we can learn from the Eagle of Resistance (tune in to find out what the hell that means...). Also Including:  The power of the John Wick system Honesty as a blunt – and often offensive – instrument D&amp;D rules for everyday life How to pay an effective compliment Ned Stark redeemed? Punishing passive aggression  Get In Touch!  Discuss the episode over on our Facebook Discussion Group And you can find us on Instagram and Twitter Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world  Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

This could be the most important Law of all: The Law of Defensiveness. At our emotional core, we're all desperately grasping onto three basic ideas – the sense that we're independent; that we are intelligent in our own way; and that we are, overall, a good and decent person. It doesn't matter that a lot of the time this isn't true – these ideas remain the cornerstones of our sense of self and we'll defend them to the last. Knowing this and learning how to manoeuvre our way around other people's internal narratives, we can finally begin to exert influence on the world around us. Robert takes the example of the rise of Lyndon Johnson. This prickly and driven young man was going nowhere fast in US politics, but once he learnt how to validate and play to other people's emotional needs, his ascent was nothing short of astonishing. What Johnson's story reveals is that effectiveness and influence isn't about having particular skills, abilities, or even about paying your dues. It's about making other people feel good around and about you. Robert reveals several key strategies to achieve this. First, we must play the role of the student: we must ask other people's opinions and advice, putting them at their ease and allowing them to feel seen and heard. So often we go through life trying to charm people with our own ideas, but this frequently backfires. When we stop talking about ourselves and what we think, we tune ourselves to other people's wisdom, experience and interests, opening the doors to deeper connection and ever greater possibilities. Most people also crave validation so badly that they can rarely turn it down. Once you become a source of that sweet nectar, you'll rarely have to ask for anything – they will want to do it for you. This rapidly starts to feel creepy and manipulative – but why? Jon and Andrea examine this disgust reflex because, when we look closely, this is how human relations work... we just spend a lot of our time ignoring it. Still, the ethics are confusing here. Are we merely making an unconscious habit into a conscious strategy, or are we lying in order to get what we want? Is this about finding ways to use people, or finding ways to connect and collaborate? Ultimately, this Law is about practical empathy and learning to put our egos on hold. Instead of building walls around ourselves, it's about going outside to explore the world and the people around us. It's also about the lessons we can learn from the Eagle of Resistance (tune in to find out what the hell that means...). Also Including: <ul> <li>The power of the John Wick system</li> <li>Honesty as a blunt – and often offensive – instrument</li> <li>D&amp;D rules for everyday life</li> <li>How to pay an effective compliment</li> <li>Ned Stark redeemed?</li> <li>Punishing passive aggression</li> </ul> Get In Touch! <ul> <li>Discuss the episode over on our <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/207829843133347/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Facebook Discussion Group</a></li> <li>And you can find us on <a href="https://www.instagram.com/vinthed.pod/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="https://twitter.com/vinthed" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Twitter</a></li> <li>Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world</li> </ul> Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

The Laws of Human Nature 8: Three Core Beliefs And How To Disarm Them

Powerful conversations and interviews about real life psychology, philosophy, psychedelics, spirituality, social dynamics and much more.Our mission is to entertain, provoke, inform, and make you question everything you think you know.Have you ever been on the wrong end of “office politics”?Or lost out to less talented people who are better at “playing the game”?Join us as we our explore Robert Greene’s provocative and compelling study of the 48 Laws of Power, in which he lays bare the psychological principles that ultimately shape all human relations.Often seen as a handbook for the ‘modern Machiavelli’, we take a closer look at how understanding and implementing these Laws can actually enrich your life personally, professionally and spiritually.

I recently discovered  this podcast and I find it very insightful and wise. These are young men who are wise beyond their years, who obviously draw from from deep seated intellectual curiosity and achievements.  I am impressed with this podcast and plan to explore of it.

A mirror on the mind

I think there’s a huge market to be had in dissecting Roberts books especially The Laws of Human Nature.

This podcast is really good I wish they kept going

Powerful conversations and interviews about real life psychology, philosophy, psychedelics, spirituality, social dynamics and much more. Our mission is to entertain, provoke, inform, and make you question everything you think you know. Have you ever been on the wrong end of “office politics”? Or lost out to less talented people who are better at “playing the game”? Join us as we our explore Robert Greene’s provocative and compelling study of the 48 Laws of Power, in which he lays bare the psychological principles that ultimately shape all human relations. Often seen as a handbook for the ‘modern Machiavelli’, we take a closer look at how understanding and implementing these Laws can actually enrich your life personally, professionally and spiritually.

Voices in the Dark

Why do people get caught up in wild and implausible conspiracy theories, get-rich-quick scams and other tantalising pyramid schemes? As we learn in this episode, even brainboxes like Isaac Newton can't seem to resist the excitement that so easily overcomes our better judgement when we think we can shortcut our way to success. And that's the problem – it's exciting. The danger comes from our emotions: we are caught in the present, enslaved to our immediate hopes and fears. Robert helps us to pause and draw back from the desire for immediate (re)action. We need to learn to play the long game and stop living in the now. This is a double-edged sword, though: we mustn't get stuck in over-planning things either, or we lose sight of what truly matters... Jon unpacks his own history of paralysis by analysis, while Andrea highlights the underlying problem: If you're constantly terrified of making The Wrong Decision, then you either never choose, or never feel you made the right call. But what about when it comes to other people? When we're quick to judge, are we going with our gut, or are we just seeing what we want to see? We take a look at some strategies and tools to tell the difference – and in the process save your relationships, friendships, and indeed yourself from dubious business opportunities. Along the way Jon and Andrea reflect on their own major fuck-ups and offend all of China. Also Including:  Horse and Sparrow Economics How do make conscious choices about risk Cobras in Delhi Jon offends all of China The modern mentor hustle  Get In Touch!  Discuss the episode over on our Facebook Discussion Group And you can find us on Instagram and Twitter Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world  Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

Why do people get caught up in wild and implausible conspiracy theories, get-rich-quick scams and other tantalising pyramid schemes? As we learn in this episode, even brainboxes like Isaac Newton can't seem to resist the excitement that so easily overcomes our better judgement when we think we can shortcut our way to success. And that's the problem – it's exciting. The danger comes from our emotions: we are caught in the present, enslaved to our immediate hopes and fears. Robert helps us to pause and draw back from the desire for immediate (re)action. We need to learn to play the long game and stop living in the now. This is a double-edged sword, though: we mustn't get stuck in over-planning things either, or we lose sight of what truly matters... Jon unpacks his own history of paralysis by analysis, while Andrea highlights the underlying problem: If you're constantly terrified of making The Wrong Decision, then you either never choose, or never feel you made the right call. But what about when it comes to other people? When we're quick to judge, are we going with our gut, or are we just seeing what we want to see? We take a look at some strategies and tools to tell the difference – and in the process save your relationships, friendships, and indeed yourself from dubious business opportunities. Along the way Jon and Andrea reflect on their own major fuck-ups and offend all of China. Also Including: <ul> <li>Horse and Sparrow Economics</li> <li>How do make conscious choices about risk</li> <li>Cobras in Delhi</li> <li>Jon offends all of China</li> <li>The modern mentor hustle</li> </ul> Get In Touch! <ul> <li>Discuss the episode over on our <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/207829843133347/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Facebook Discussion Group</a></li> <li>And you can find us on <a href="https://www.instagram.com/vinthed.pod/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="https://twitter.com/vinthed" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Twitter</a></li> <li>Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world</li> </ul> Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

The Laws of Human Nature 7: Why Do You Want To Get Rich Quick?

David Bryan

Everyone's obsessed with 'the hustle' these days – it seems like we're meant to be on duty promoting ourselves and pushing to the next level 24/7... But what does 'hustling' even mean? Are we meant to be glued to LinkedIn, trying to find that one magical connection that'll launch us into the stratosphere? Or diving into the world of SEO – optimising our personal websites in sacrifice to the gods of Google? David Bryan – star of the award-winning show Trashed – joins us to talk about the real hustle: the psychological hustle. Acting is one of the toughest careers out there when it comes to getting noticed and rising to the top, so David's knowledge and experience of that hustle runs deep. But we're not just talking acting in this conversation – this is about the psychology of motivation, self-esteem, and what real success actually feels like. Life and work can be a grind, but how can we make it the best grind possible? What does 'talent' actually mean? Is it all in the eye of the beholder and what they value, or can it be something more? We get into why rejection is part of the game and how to use it as a springboard rather than a tombstone; why it's better to have 10 true fans than 10,000 Instagram followers who don't really care about what you do; and what making good use of your time actually means on the day-to-day level. We also share some of our most shameful moments and what they taught us and how David managed to put on an award-winning one-man show at the Edinburgh Festival from scratch (don't forget to check out our  first interview with David (and playwright Sascha Moore) back in August when their show, Trashed, was in full swing!).   Also Including:  The psychology of motivation Acting as entrepreneurship Why sharing your experience can be motivation in itself Documenting your life for yourself and your family How to do social media without being a narcissist Creating something out of nowhere  Find David:  His professional website Instagram Twitter YouTube vlogs  Find Out More:  Neil Gaiman's brilliant speech: Make Good Art  Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

Everyone's obsessed with 'the hustle' these days – it seems like we're meant to be on duty promoting ourselves and pushing to the next level 24/7... But what does 'hustling' even mean? Are we meant to be glued to LinkedIn, trying to find that one magical connection that'll launch us into the stratosphere? Or diving into the world of SEO – optimising our personal websites in sacrifice to the gods of Google? David Bryan – star of the award-winning show Trashed – joins us to talk about the real hustle: the psychological hustle. Acting is one of the toughest careers out there when it comes to getting noticed and rising to the top, so David's knowledge and experience of that hustle runs deep. But we're not just talking acting in this conversation – this is about the psychology of motivation, self-esteem, and what real success actually feels like. Life and work can be a grind, but how can we make it the best grind possible? What does 'talent' actually mean? Is it all in the eye of the beholder and what they value, or can it be something more? We get into why rejection is part of the game and how to use it as a springboard rather than a tombstone; why it's better to have 10 true fans than 10,000 Instagram followers who don't really care about what you do; and what making good use of your time actually means on the day-to-day level. We also share some of our most shameful moments and what they taught us and how David managed to put on an award-winning one-man show at the Edinburgh Festival from scratch (don't forget to check out our <a href="https://voicesinthedark.world/trashed-when-life-goes-off-the-rails-sascha-moore-david-bryan-interview/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> first interview with David</a> (and playwright Sascha Moore) back in August when their show, Trashed, was in full swing!).   Also Including: <ul> <li>The psychology of motivation</li> <li>Acting as entrepreneurship</li> <li>Why sharing your experience can be motivation in itself</li> <li>Documenting your life for yourself and your family</li> <li>How to do social media without being a narcissist</li> <li>Creating something out of nowhere</li> </ul> Find David: <ul> <li>His professional <a href="http://www.davidwilliambryan.co.uk/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">website</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.instagram.com/davidwilliambryan/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Instagram</a></li> <li><a href="https://twitter.com/DavidWBryan" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Twitter</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.youtube.com/user/davidwilliambryan" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">YouTube vlogs</a></li> </ul> Find Out More: <ul> <li>Neil Gaiman's brilliant speech: <a href="https://youtu.be/plWexCID-kA" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Make Good Art</a></li> </ul> Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

Psychology Of The Hustle With Award-Winning Actor David Bryan

It's time to get spiritual this week as Stoicism starts to merge almost imperceptibly with an even more ancient philosophy: Buddhism. This is Letter 41: 'On the God within Us', and it not only draws us into the realm of motivation and growth, but also how we fundamentally value and think about ourselves. The Buddha taught that we all have 'Buddha nature', and that much of the path to enlightenment (or 'the good life', as Seneca would call it) is about learning how to recognise it. This is a world away from Jordan Peterson's approach to self-development. For him, we're all fallen, disgusting creatures who can at best hope to pull ourselves a little way out of our own filth. But what if we thought of ourselves, not as fallen angels, but as rising apes? But to do that, we need to take action. Seneca exhorts Lucilius not to just sit about moping and waiting for life to happen to him, but to get off his ass and do something. And for us in the modern world, a surprising amount of change and growth can happen simply by writing a few emails, making contacts, and asking for input. Yet with modern technology taking us ever closer to Matrix-style downloads of knowledge, what might we lose along the way? Seneca insists that you have to do the hard work of learning to ever reap its benefits... and he might be right. Even if you could instantly 'know kung-fu', what happens to all the emotional growth which the dedication and discipline of doing it the old fashioned way can bring you? This week's episode also takes us back to the centre of Stoicism, but shows it from a different perspective. Every external possession can be taken from us, so all that's truly 'ours' is our internal world. So why should we admire people for attributes which don't truly belong to them? Fancy clothes, big houses and TV shows aren't the core of what makes someone who they are. All the same, they might be expressions of what you've achieved... Thankfully, we untie this philosophical knot be=y casting the world into two simple categories: people who admire the Kardashians and people who admire The Rock! Because it's not about the bling, it's about being yourself. Whether it's Napoleon or you, it's ultimately all about being the most youyou can be. The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are, as Joseph Campbell put it, and in this episode we really dig down into what that means and how to apply it to your everyday life. Jon also shares his experiences of cosmic unity while tripping on Huachuma in the Amazon and spending a month in a Buddhist monastery... and how they're all sort of Stoicism. And alongside trying to understand what makes sunsets appear so beautiful to us, Andrea admits he's been having dreams about Jon for years... Also Including:  Saying 'no' with panache How to own fight-or-flight moments Why love is like the sun Does it have soul? Baking hate cakes  Find Out More:  Come discuss the show in our Facebook Group Hit us up on Instagram! The full text for freeon WikiSource Our new Sex &amp; Relationshipsepisodes!  Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

It's time to get spiritual this week as Stoicism starts to merge almost imperceptibly with an even more ancient philosophy: Buddhism. This is Letter 41: 'On the God within Us', and it not only draws us into the realm of motivation and growth, but also how we fundamentally value and think about ourselves. The Buddha taught that we all have 'Buddha nature', and that much of the path to enlightenment (or 'the good life', as Seneca would call it) is about learning how to recognise it. This is a world away from Jordan Peterson's approach to self-development. For him, we're all fallen, disgusting creatures who can at best hope to pull ourselves a little way out of our own filth. But what if we thought of ourselves, not as fallen angels, but as rising apes? But to do that, we need to take action. Seneca exhorts Lucilius not to just sit about moping and waiting for life to happen to him, but to get off his ass and do something. And for us in the modern world, a surprising amount of change and growth can happen simply by writing a few emails, making contacts, and asking for input. Yet with modern technology taking us ever closer to Matrix-style downloads of knowledge, what might we lose along the way? Seneca insists that you have to do the hard work of learning to ever reap its benefits... and he might be right. Even if you could instantly 'know kung-fu', what happens to all the emotional growth which the dedication and discipline of doing it the old fashioned way can bring you? This week's episode also takes us back to the centre of Stoicism, but shows it from a different perspective. Every external possession can be taken from us, so all that's truly 'ours' is our internal world. So why should we admire people for attributes which don't truly belong to them? Fancy clothes, big houses and TV shows aren't the core of what makes someone who they are. All the same, they might be expressions of what you've achieved... Thankfully, we untie this philosophical knot be=y casting the world into two simple categories: people who admire the Kardashians and people who admire The Rock! Because it's not about the bling, it's about being yourself. Whether it's Napoleon or you, it's ultimately all about being the most youyou can be. The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are, as Joseph Campbell put it, and in this episode we really dig down into what that means and how to apply it to your everyday life. Jon also shares his experiences of cosmic unity while tripping on Huachuma in the Amazon and spending a month in a Buddhist monastery... and how they're all sort of Stoicism. And alongside trying to understand what makes sunsets appear so beautiful to us, Andrea admits he's been having dreams about Jon for years... Also Including: <ul> <li>Saying 'no' with panache</li> <li>How to own fight-or-flight moments</li> <li>Why love is like the sun</li> <li>Does it have soul?</li> <li>Baking hate cakes</li> </ul> Find Out More: <ul> <li>Come discuss the show in our <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/207829843133347" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Facebook Group</a></li> <li>Hit us up on <a href="https://www.instagram.com/vinthed.pod" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Instagram</a>!</li> <li><a href="https://en.wikisource.org/wiki/Moral_letters_to_Lucilius" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">The full text for free</a>on WikiSource</li> <li>Our new <a href="https://voicesinthedark.world/category/sex-relationships/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sex &amp; Relationships</a>episodes!</li> </ul> Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

The Modern Stoic #28: How To Be Who You Are

Control The Options: Get Others To Play With The Cards You Deal How did I end up in this mess? All too often that's the question we ask ourselves when we look back and realise we've been led by the nose into a situation we'd never have chosen willingly. And yet it seemed like we were free to choose every step of the way. So what happened? Law 31 is what happened: when someone manages to control your options, you find yourself playing on their chessboard, never quite sure of the rules and yet still wanting to believe that you can influence the way the game plays out. You can't; this episode explores why. In this episode, Jon and Dre look at the Law from all sides, from the dangerous ways it can be used to enable and support domestic abuse, to the way it can garner you a few freebies at your local restaurant. We learn how Dre's Mum always gets what she wants, the role ape social dynamics play in our social interactions, and how to become the most powerful courtesan in history. Jon shares some tense real life examples from his own dating history, and reflects on how voicing your insecurities can actually create the reality you fear. Dre breaks down how Law 31 works in everyday life when dealing with clients, as well as the fiendish tricks that online marketers use to get your money. To round things off, they contemplate the dangerous ways informal practices can later be reinterpreted and cost you everything, and provide some strategies to avoid incriminating yourself under pressure. This episode includes:  Is it better to know a subject deeply, or see the broader dynamics? Sausage duels and how to conduct them How this Law interacts with Law 16: Use Absence To Increase Respect The danger of working within other people's parameters – and assuming those parameters even exist How to craft and hold the strongest frame Control the questions to get people to do what you want Behavioural cues and their power to shape all our interactions The uses and limits of reverse psychology The sunken costs fallacy Why we need privacy even when we have 'nothing to hide'  Mentioned in the episode:  Dre's favourite shirt: Fuck You, Don't Tell Me What To Do! And our Enlightened Meathead tanktops The matchstick trick we mention The delicious Scotch Malt Whisky Society The ever-excellent Philip McKernan Tony Robbins – shit or not? Friend of the show, Peter Sage – check out our in-depth interview with him The Serial podcast And the amazing spin-off which played a role in getting Adnan's case reopened, Undisclosed  Challenge: Use Dre (and Dre's Mum's) tactics to get yourself some extras when you're next in a customer service interaction. Act calm and confident that things are not as they should be and so clearly something must be done to improve things. Don't be rude or crude; this is about your frame, not your ego. Be silly. Be kind. Be weird. Join us as we continue our 48 Laws of Power review, exploring Robert Greene’s provocative and compelling book, in which he lays bare the history, practice, psychology, and philosophies of power that ultimately shape all human relations. Often seen as a handbook for the ‘modern Machiavelli’, we take a closer look, beyond the hyperbole, and discuss how understanding and implementing these Laws can actually enrich your life personally, professionally and spiritually. Jon and Dre aim to get to the heart of each of the Laws, grapple with their sometimes disturbingly amoral nature, and discuss what the Laws mean in everyday life (often revealing their own experiences – good and bad – when they’ve either observed or transgressed them).

Control The Options: Get Others To Play With The Cards You Deal How did I end up in this mess? All too often that's the question we ask ourselves when we look back and realise we've been led by the nose into a situation we'd never have chosen willingly. And yet it seemed like we were free to choose every step of the way. So what happened? Law 31 is what happened: when someone manages to control your options, you find yourself playing on their chessboard, never quite sure of the rules and yet still wanting to believe that you can influence the way the game plays out. You can't; this episode explores why. In this episode, Jon and Dre look at the Law from all sides, from the dangerous ways it can be used to enable and support domestic abuse, to the way it can garner you a few freebies at your local restaurant. We learn how Dre's Mum always gets what she wants, the role ape social dynamics play in our social interactions, and how to become the most powerful courtesan in history. Jon shares some tense real life examples from his own dating history, and reflects on how voicing your insecurities can actually create the reality you fear. Dre breaks down how Law 31 works in everyday life when dealing with clients, as well as the fiendish tricks that online marketers use to get your money. To round things off, they contemplate the dangerous ways informal practices can later be reinterpreted and cost you everything, and provide some strategies to avoid incriminating yourself under pressure. This episode includes: <ul> <li>Is it better to know a subject deeply, or see the broader dynamics?</li> <li>Sausage duels and how to conduct them</li> <li>How this Law interacts with Law 16: Use Absence To Increase Respect</li> <li>The danger of working within other people's parameters – and assuming those parameters even exist</li> <li>How to craft and hold the strongest frame</li> <li>Control the questions to get people to do what you want</li> <li>Behavioural cues and their power to shape all our interactions</li> <li>The uses and limits of reverse psychology</li> <li>The sunken costs fallacy</li> <li>Why we need privacy even when we have 'nothing to hide'</li> </ul> Mentioned in the episode: <ul> <li>Dre's favourite shirt: Fuck You, Don't Tell Me What To Do!</li> <li>And our Enlightened Meathead tanktops</li> <li>The matchstick trick we mention</li> <li>The delicious Scotch Malt Whisky Society</li> <li>The ever-excellent Philip McKernan</li> <li>Tony Robbins – shit or not?</li> <li>Friend of the show, Peter Sage – check out our in-depth interview with him</li> <li>The Serial podcast</li> <li>And the amazing spin-off which played a role in getting Adnan's case reopened, Undisclosed</li> </ul> Challenge: Use Dre (and Dre's Mum's) tactics to get yourself some extras when you're next in a customer service interaction. Act calm and confident that things are not as they should be and so clearly something must be done to improve things. Don't be rude or crude; this is about your frame, not your ego. Be silly. Be kind. Be weird. Join us as we continue our 48 Laws of Power review, exploring Robert Greene’s provocative and compelling book, in which he lays bare the history, practice, psychology, and philosophies of power that ultimately shape all human relations. Often seen as a handbook for the ‘modern Machiavelli’, we take a closer look, beyond the hyperbole, and discuss how understanding and implementing these Laws can actually enrich your life personally, professionally and spiritually. Jon and Dre aim to get to the heart of each of the Laws, grapple with their sometimes disturbingly amoral nature, and discuss what the Laws mean in everyday life (often revealing their own experiences – good and bad – when they’ve either observed or transgressed them).

031 - Exploring The 48 Laws of Power - Control The Options: Get Others To Play With The Cards You Deal

Stop scrolling. You're bored. But what sort of bored are you? Remember blackouts? Remember how you managed to have fun, play games, and actually talk to each other when all the electronic distractions were forcibly removed? Remember tedious hours at work when you let your plans and ideas unfold? Or dull hours of practising something that mattered to you? From Wi-Fi on planes to infinite newsfeeds, now more than ever we have to make the choice to focus our attention and get the deep work done. But it might not be fun. This episode is all about changing our relationship to boredom. It's time to weaponise it and turn it into a training ground for the things we want to achieve and become. We explore how 50 Cent turned his hustling days into an apprenticeship in business; how spending a couple of hours in a sensory deprivation tank actually gives you more time in your day; and how to turn the daily grind into the perfect opportunity. From Michelangelo to BeeBop, Demosthenes to serial killing, this episode is packed with tales of creativity born from hardship and tedium. We explain why kids don't actually learn languages quickly (and are pretty dumb, too); why 75% of doing a PhD is simply not giving up; and how reading can improve your breathing. Jon reflects on his failure to learn to play guitar, but his persistence in learning how to ad lib on piano; Dre reconquers the Rubik's Cube; and we both discuss the continuing influence of toxic relationships on the present. This Episode Includes:  Internalising the nuts and bolts... and then forgetting it all so you can actually play Cultivating discipline and refusing quick fixes Learning how to learn Calling 911 when you see the stars Discerning when the obstacle is the way, or when it's time to find a new obstacle  Mentioned in the Episode:  Robert's other (excellent) book, Mastery Ned the cat’s Instagram account @nedkitteh Malcolm Gladwell's book, Blink Our friends at the hilarious Probably Offensive podcast Breaking Convention 2017 – the psychedelics research conference we attended    Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

Stop scrolling. You're bored. But what sort of bored are you? Remember blackouts? Remember how you managed to have fun, play games, and actually talk to each other when all the electronic distractions were forcibly removed? Remember tedious hours at work when you let your plans and ideas unfold? Or dull hours of practising something that mattered to you? From Wi-Fi on planes to infinite newsfeeds, now more than ever we have to make the choice to focus our attention and get the deep work done. But it might not be fun. This episode is all about changing our relationship to boredom. It's time to weaponise it and turn it into a training ground for the things we want to achieve and become. We explore how 50 Cent turned his hustling days into an apprenticeship in business; how spending a couple of hours in a sensory deprivation tank actually gives you more time in your day; and how to turn the daily grind into the perfect opportunity. From Michelangelo to BeeBop, Demosthenes to serial killing, this episode is packed with tales of creativity born from hardship and tedium. We explain why kids don't actually learn languages quickly (and are pretty dumb, too); why 75% of doing a PhD is simply not giving up; and how reading can improve your breathing. Jon reflects on his failure to learn to play guitar, but his persistence in learning how to ad lib on piano; Dre reconquers the Rubik's Cube; and we both discuss the continuing influence of toxic relationships on the present. This Episode Includes: <ul> <li>Internalising the nuts and bolts... and then forgetting it all so you can actually play</li> <li>Cultivating discipline and refusing quick fixes</li> <li>Learning how to learn</li> <li>Calling 911 when you see the stars</li> <li>Discerning when the obstacle is the way, or when it's time to find a new obstacle</li> </ul> Mentioned in the Episode: <ul> <li>Robert's other (excellent) book, Mastery</li> <li>Ned the cat’s Instagram account @nedkitteh</li> <li>Malcolm Gladwell's book, Blink</li> <li>Our friends at the hilarious <a href="https://www.facebook.com/ProbablyOffensivePodcast/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Probably Offensive</a> podcast</li> <li><a href="http://www.breakingconvention.co.uk/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Breaking Convention 2017</a> – the psychedelics research conference we attended</li> </ul>   Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

The 50th Law – Part 9: Respect The Process - Mastery

Learn To Keep People Dependent On You An uncomfortable Law that makes us consider just who we are important to – and how precarious that can be as we struggle to become the power behind the throne. This is about the need to become indispensable... or at least to appear to be, making it the complementary piece to Law 1: here we learn how to be and remain The Master, but also how to remain essential to a Master without coming to outshine them. Along the way we hear how Dre managed to keep ahead of the game by diversifying his skillset before he became replaceable, while Jon failed at every turn to seed doubt in the minds of others or to defeat any bureaucrats at all. We also drop in on the bizarre world of Russian cloakrooms, dog-eating squirrels, and take time to consider the artificial, fast-food way we try to feel power over our lives by using social media, rather than cultivating meaningful relationships. This Episode includes:  How to make yourself indispensable, and the price you pay if you don't The awesome power of coat-check attendants in Russia Ally yourself with someone weak who you can help make strong; don't get lost in the crowd of the already-strong Find your niche, which will become your domain of power How modern, short-term thinking distracts you from the road to power: play the long (even the 'infinite') game if you want to succeed Does knowing other people's secrets make you powerful, or more vulnerable? How to drop hints to make people worry that you have power over them The master of psych-outs: Arnold Schwarzenegger Why power only exists in relation to other people Becoming the power behind the power behind the throne, and the web of dependence involved The bizarre cult of 'authenticity' Dre goes full Machiavelli and reveals his plans to predict all human behaviour  Mentioned in the Episode:  Our favourite Bismarck T-Shirt! The famous painting of the declaration of the formation of Germany, featuring Bismarck as the central figure 'Dropping the Pilot' – the cartoon satirising Wilhelm II's dismissal of Bismarck – a decision that would have disastrous consequences Dre's 'best film ever': Pumping Iron Some of Michael Schumacher's most controversial moments in the pursuit of victory Russia's terrifying killer squirrels The Russian dogs who know how to ride the Moscow Metro The book Jon mentioned: Finite and Infinite Games, by James Carse The picture of the Éminence grise Dre described Sir Thomas More – another ultimately dispensable figure in Henry VIII's court Chris Ryan's brilliant podcast, Tangentially Speaking, and his upcoming book, Civilized to Death Isaac Asimov's Foundation Trilogy and the idea of Psychohistory  Join us as we continue our exploration of Robert Greene’s provocative and compelling study of the 48 Laws of Power, in which he lays bare the history, practice, psychology, and philosophies of power that ultimately shape all human relations. Often seen as a handbook for the ‘modern Machiavelli’, we take a closer look, beyond the hyperbole, and discuss how understanding and implementing these Laws can actually enrich your life personally, professionally and spiritually. Jon and Dre aim to get to the heart of each of the Laws, grapple with their sometimes disturbingly amoral nature, and discuss what the Laws mean in everyday life (often revealing their own experiences – good and bad – when they’ve either observed or transgressed them).   FULL NOTES: http://voicesinthedark.world/2016/08/15/learn-to-keep-pe…power-episode-11/

Learn To Keep People Dependent On You An uncomfortable Law that makes us consider just who we are important to – and how precarious that can be as we struggle to become the power behind the throne. This is about the need to become indispensable... or at least to appear to be, making it the complementary piece to <a href="http://voicesinthedark.world/2016/02/04/exploring-the-48-laws-of-power-episode-01/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Law 1</a>: here we learn how to be and remain The Master, but also how to remain essential to a Master without coming to outshine them. Along the way we hear how Dre managed to keep ahead of the game by diversifying his skillset before he became replaceable, while Jon failed at every turn to seed doubt in the minds of others or to defeat any bureaucrats at all. We also drop in on the bizarre world of Russian cloakrooms, dog-eating squirrels, and take time to consider the artificial, fast-food way we try to feel power over our lives by using social media, rather than cultivating meaningful relationships. This Episode includes: <ul> <li>How to make yourself indispensable, and the price you pay if you don't</li> <li>The awesome power of coat-check attendants in Russia</li> <li>Ally yourself with someone weak who you can help make strong; don't get lost in the crowd of the already-strong</li> <li>Find your niche, which will become your domain of power</li> <li>How modern, short-term thinking distracts you from the road to power: play the long (even the 'infinite') game if you want to succeed</li> <li>Does knowing other people's secrets make you powerful, or more vulnerable?</li> <li>How to drop hints to make people worry that you have power over them</li> <li>The master of psych-outs: Arnold Schwarzenegger</li> <li>Why power only exists in relation to other people</li> <li>Becoming the power behind the power behind the throne, and the web of dependence involved</li> <li>The bizarre cult of 'authenticity'</li> <li>Dre goes full Machiavelli and reveals his plans to predict all human behaviour</li> </ul> Mentioned in the Episode: <ul> <li>Our favourite <a href="https://misanthrotees.com/search?q=bismarck" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Bismarck T-Shirt</a>!</li> <li>The <a href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Wernerprokla.jpg#/media/File:Wernerprokla.jpg" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">famous painting</a> of the declaration of the formation of Germany, featuring Bismarck as the central figure</li> <li>'<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dropping_the_Pilot" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Dropping the Pilot</a>' – the cartoon satirising Wilhelm II's dismissal of Bismarck – a decision that would have disastrous consequences</li> <li>Dre's 'best film ever': Pumping Iron</li> <li>Some of Michael Schumacher's <a href="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/motorsport/formulaone/michael-schumacher/7718722/Michael-Schumachers-top-five-F1-controversies.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">most controversial moments</a> in the pursuit of victory</li> <li>Russia's terrifying <a href="http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/4489792.stm" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">killer squirrels</a></li> <li>The Russian dogs who know <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Street_dogs_in_Moscow#Metro_dogs" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">how to ride the Moscow Metro</a></li> <li>The book Jon mentioned: Finite and Infinite Games, by James Carse</li> <li>The <a href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:G%C3%A9r%C3%B4me_Eminence_grise_1873.jpg#/media/File:G%C3%A9r%C3%B4me_Eminence_grise_1873.jpg" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">picture of the Éminence grise</a> Dre described</li> <li><a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thomas_More" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sir Thomas More</a> – another ultimately dispensable figure in Henry VIII's court</li> <li>Chris Ryan's brilliant podcast, <a href="http://chrisryanphd.com/tangentially-speaking/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Tangentially Speaking</a>, and his upcoming book, Civilized to Death</li> <li>Isaac Asimov's Foundation Trilogy and the idea of <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychohistory_(fictional)" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Psychohistory</a></li> </ul> Join us as we continue our exploration of Robert Greene’s provocative and compelling study of the 48 Laws of Power, in which he lays bare the history, practice, psychology, and philosophies of power that ultimately shape all human relations. Often seen as a handbook for the ‘modern Machiavelli’, we take a closer look, beyond the hyperbole, and discuss how understanding and implementing these Laws can actually enrich your life personally, professionally and spiritually. Jon and Dre aim to get to the heart of each of the Laws, grapple with their sometimes disturbingly amoral nature, and discuss what the Laws mean in everyday life (often revealing their own experiences – good and bad – when they’ve either observed or transgressed them). FULL NOTES: <a href="http://voicesinthedark.world/2016/08/15/learn-to-keep-people-dependent-on-you-exploring-the-48-laws-of-power-episode-11/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">http://voicesinthedark.world/2016/08/15/learn-to-keep-pe…power-episode-11/</a>

011 - Exploring The 48 Laws Of Power - Learn To Keep People Dependent On You

Narcissists aren't what you think they are. We throw the word around so liberally these days that it's almost been drained of real meaning. But narcissists are real. Narcissists are dangerous. We need to know how to spot them before we become enmeshed in their web of psychological warfare. First of all, narcissists are not the same as egotists. They actually don'tthink they're amazing and then try to force their amazingness on the rest of us. On the contrary, they have such a damaged and fragile sense of themselves that they rely on outside input to feel that they exist at all. They have no self-esteem safety-net and instead live a desperate existence in which they try to make everything about them. Lacking a core sense of self means you endlessly try to calibrate and maintain it in relation to other people. That means drama, mind games, and a brutal disregard of other people's lives and agency. But Robert Greene reveals a still more disturbing truth which we dig into in this episode. We are all on the narcissist spectrum. We all see the world with us at its centre. We find ourselves waiting to speak rather than listening to others. We take things too personally and react with anger rather than trying to put ourselves in others' shoes and think about what lies behind their words and their actions. This episode provides you with a toolkit for recognising deep narcissists before they entangle you (because at first they will seem incredibly warm, charming and insightful). But it also turns the magnifying glass back on ourselves so that we can strive to become healthy, empathetic narcissists. We can't disown our nature, but we can certainly do the personal work to make ourselves better, kinder and more effective humans. Jon and Andrea open up about their own narcissistic tendencies, the mistakes they've made, and the narcissists they've survived. We talk about abusive bosses, partners and mentors... and in the process pull back the curtain on Andrea's time at London Real to tell you who Brian Rose really is. Also Including:  How perturbation points shape who we are Fucking up your kids The virtues of silence Treating people as ends, not means The healthy narcissist and how to become one Social Justice narcissists  Get In Touch!  Discuss the episode over on our Facebook Discussion Group And you can find us on Instagramand Twitter Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world  Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

Narcissists aren't what you think they are. We throw the word around so liberally these days that it's almost been drained of real meaning. But narcissists are real. Narcissists are dangerous. We need to know how to spot them before we become enmeshed in their web of psychological warfare. First of all, narcissists are not the same as egotists. They actually don'tthink they're amazing and then try to force their amazingness on the rest of us. On the contrary, they have such a damaged and fragile sense of themselves that they rely on outside input to feel that they exist at all. They have no self-esteem safety-net and instead live a desperate existence in which they try to make everything about them. Lacking a core sense of self means you endlessly try to calibrate and maintain it in relation to other people. That means drama, mind games, and a brutal disregard of other people's lives and agency. But Robert Greene reveals a still more disturbing truth which we dig into in this episode. We are all on the narcissist spectrum. We all see the world with us at its centre. We find ourselves waiting to speak rather than listening to others. We take things too personally and react with anger rather than trying to put ourselves in others' shoes and think about what lies behind their words and their actions. This episode provides you with a toolkit for recognising deep narcissists before they entangle you (because at first they will seem incredibly warm, charming and insightful). But it also turns the magnifying glass back on ourselves so that we can strive to become healthy, empathetic narcissists. We can't disown our nature, but we can certainly do the personal work to make ourselves better, kinder and more effective humans. Jon and Andrea open up about their own narcissistic tendencies, the mistakes they've made, and the narcissists they've survived. We talk about abusive bosses, partners and mentors... and in the process pull back the curtain on Andrea's time at London Real to tell you who Brian Rose really is. Also Including: <ul> <li>How perturbation points shape who we are</li> <li>Fucking up your kids</li> <li>The virtues of silence</li> <li>Treating people as ends, not means</li> <li>The healthy narcissist and how to become one</li> <li>Social Justice narcissists</li> </ul> Get In Touch! <ul> <li>Discuss the episode over on our <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/207829843133347/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Facebook Discussion Group</a></li> <li>And you can find us on <a href="https://www.instagram.com/vinthed.pod/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Instagram</a>and <a href="https://twitter.com/vinthed" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Twitter</a></li> <li>Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world</li> </ul> Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

The Laws of Human Nature 3: How To Identify & Deal With Narcissists (1/2)

After ten years of blood, sweat and tears, Jon's book has finally emerged into the world! It hit the Amazon Bestseller lists on launch day and has been receiving excellent reviews. This week, we put Jon in the hot seat to talk about it. In the shadow of the Gulag, Soviet citizens were still cracking jokes. They had to. Drawing on diaries, interviews, memoirs and hundreds of previously secret documents, the book, It’s Only a Joke, Comrade!, uncovers how they joked, coped, and struggled to adapt in Stalin’s brave new world. It asks what it really means to live under a dictatorship: How do people make sense of their lives? How do they talk about it? And whom can they trust to do so? Humour is a universal part of the human condition. It helps us define who we are, who theyare, what's important to us, and what we won't stand for. We use it to mock a rival, charm a stranger and to solidify friendships... but we also use it to deal with the things which oppress and frighten us. It's easy to forget, but 'funny' and 'serious' are not opposites. People were still cracking jokes in Auschwitz because, even in the darkest times, humour comes to our aid. But how does that work psychologically? Is it some kind of resistance to external power, or is it more like Stoicism – changing how we feel without truly changing objective circumstances? So does the Soviet story have lessons to teach us about political humour today? Does it have any power to hurt the likes of Trump and Putin, or are we just making ourselves feel better about doing nothing to effect real change? Plus there's a chance to win yourself a copy of the book! Find Out More:  The book's website Buy the book: USand UK  Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

After ten years of blood, sweat and tears, Jon's book has finally emerged into the world! It hit the Amazon Bestseller lists on launch day and has been receiving excellent reviews. This week, we put Jon in the hot seat to talk about it. In the shadow of the Gulag, Soviet citizens were still cracking jokes. They had to. Drawing on diaries, interviews, memoirs and hundreds of previously secret documents, the book, It’s Only a Joke, Comrade!, uncovers how they joked, coped, and struggled to adapt in Stalin’s brave new world. It asks what it really means to live under a dictatorship: How do people make sense of their lives? How do they talk about it? And whom can they trust to do so? Humour is a universal part of the human condition. It helps us define who we are, who theyare, what's important to us, and what we won't stand for. We use it to mock a rival, charm a stranger and to solidify friendships... but we also use it to deal with the things which oppress and frighten us. It's easy to forget, but 'funny' and 'serious' are not opposites. People were still cracking jokes in Auschwitz because, even in the darkest times, humour comes to our aid. But how does that work psychologically? Is it some kind of resistance to external power, or is it more like Stoicism – changing how we feel without truly changing objective circumstances? So does the Soviet story have lessons to teach us about political humour today? Does it have any power to hurt the likes of Trump and Putin, or are we just making ourselves feel better about doing nothing to effect real change? Plus there's a chance to win yourself a copy of the book! Find Out More: <ul> <li>The book's <a href="https://onlyajokecomrade.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">website</a></li> <li>Buy the book: <a href="https://amzn.to/2KB2K1X" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">US</a>and <a href="https://amzn.to/2vMXV0e" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">UK</a></li> </ul> Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

I Joke, Therefore I Am: Repression, Resistance, And The Psychology of Humour

Jamie Alderton

World record holder; iTunes chart-topping podcaster; creator of the world’s first online gym; fitness model; former soldier; body transformation coach; husband; father… and now author of the Amazon bestseller Mindset With Muscle, Jamie Alderton is a man with more than a few strings to his bow. WATCH IT ON YOUTUBE As the title of his book suggests, Jamie likes to flex his mind as well as his biceps, and in this exclusive interview we dive into some powerful ideas about life, goals, self-perception, relationships, mental health, and more:  What can the gym teach you about life? How to learn discipline, but not be trapped in obedience: how Jamie went from the soldier mindset to super successful entrepreneur The incredible power of turning your life into a game The power of listening other people… and how to avoid serially triggering each other’s insecurities Debunking the myths that fitness magazines continue to peddle: what do you really have to do to get the body you want? And why does that even matter? Why setting goals can be counterproductive When things are tough, how to tell when it’s time to go ‘all in’, or to recognise that you’re on the wrong track What does it mean to be a man in 2017, and what should it mean? Breaking down the stereotypes of The Meathead and The Geek The difference between Knowing and Doing, and why most of us get stuck at Knowing ‘Fun Shit Friday’ – what it is and why you should have one too  Check out Jamie’s most-gifted book, the 30-million-copy bestseller, Psycho-Cybernetics

World record holder; iTunes chart-topping podcaster; creator of the world’s first online gym; fitness model; former soldier; body transformation coach; husband; father… and now author of the Amazon bestseller <a href="http://voicesinthedark.world/product/1781332142/US/vointhda-20/?cart=y" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Mindset With Muscle</a>, Jamie Alderton is a man with more than a few strings to his bow. <a href="https://youtu.be/QYLLO3Wp6bE" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">WATCH IT ON YOUTUBE</a> As the title of his book suggests, Jamie likes to flex his mind as well as his biceps, and in this exclusive interview we dive into some powerful ideas about life, goals, self-perception, relationships, mental health, and more: <ul> <li>What can the gym teach you about life?</li> <li>How to learn discipline, but not be trapped in obedience: how Jamie went from the soldier mindset to super successful entrepreneur</li> <li>The incredible power of turning your life into a game</li> <li>The power of listening other people… and how to avoid serially triggering each other’s insecurities</li> <li>Debunking the myths that fitness magazines continue to peddle: what do you really have to do to get the body you want? And why does that even matter?</li> <li>Why setting goals can be counterproductive</li> <li>When things are tough, how to tell when it’s time to go ‘all in’, or to recognise that you’re on the wrong track</li> <li>What does it mean to be a man in 2017, and what should it mean?</li> <li>Breaking down the stereotypes of The Meathead and The Geek</li> <li>The difference between Knowing and Doing, and why most of us get stuck at Knowing</li> <li>‘Fun Shit Friday’ – what it is and why you should have one too</li> </ul> Check out Jamie’s most-gifted book, the 30-million-copy bestseller, <a href="http://voicesinthedark.world/product/0399176136/US/vointhda-20/?cart=y" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Psycho-Cybernetics</a>

Mindset with Muscle - Jamie Alderton Interview

Philip McKernan

After a successful Go Fund Me campaign, Jon raised enough money to spend an intensive weekend retreat with coach, speaker, author and emotional terrorist Philip McKernan. And he's still reeling from what happened. So what happened, and how's Jon doing today? It was an intimate event at a hotel in a tiny village. They spent most of it locked in a room with a man whose speciality is relentlessly asking some of the most deep and searching questions about yourself, your life, and your relationships with people, money, and even to your own identity. It's what Jon's calling McKernan's Emotional Cheese-grater. There were tears, but there was also laughter, insight, and a renewed sense of purpose. Jon opens up in this super raw episode about some of his deepest insecurities; how he discovered what's been holding him back from publishing the book he's been working on for 10 years; and he shares some of McKernan's most powerful, potentially life-changing questions. We get into some of the most common emotional blockages we all face: trying to solve emotional problems with intellectual solutions; wasting time trying to get people to like and see you, instead of choosing to spend time with the people who already 'get' you; and how the source of the trouble we experience in one area of our lives often lies in a different, totally unexpected place. This is an episode about making change: recognising what's wrong and consciously deciding to take action. How can you get your friends or partner to support you to make that change? What's the difference between needing something and simply being open to it? And how can we make any of this change without being judgemental and beating ourselves up in the process? This one's personal. We hope it helps you reflect on where you're at in your own journey, too. Get in touch to let us know what came up for you, too – questions and reflections are always welcome!  Some of Philip's most powerful questions to ask yourself:  Where in my life am I settling? What am I tired of? Am I using my gift or my talent? What mask am I still wearing, and how would I describe it? What conversation am I avoiding? What part of me can the world not see?  Find Out More:  Check out our  exclusive video interview with Philip! The classic 'It's Not About The Nail' video – check it out!  Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

After a successful Go Fund Me campaign, Jon raised enough money to spend an intensive weekend retreat with coach, speaker, author and emotional terrorist Philip McKernan. And he's still reeling from what happened. So what happened, and how's Jon doing today? It was an intimate event at a hotel in a tiny village. They spent most of it locked in a room with a man whose speciality is relentlessly asking some of the most deep and searching questions about yourself, your life, and your relationships with people, money, and even to your own identity. It's what Jon's calling McKernan's Emotional Cheese-grater. There were tears, but there was also laughter, insight, and a renewed sense of purpose. Jon opens up in this super raw episode about some of his deepest insecurities; how he discovered what's been holding him back from publishing the book he's been working on for 10 years; and he shares some of McKernan's most powerful, potentially life-changing questions. We get into some of the most common emotional blockages we all face: trying to solve emotional problems with intellectual solutions; wasting time trying to get people to like and see you, instead of choosing to spend time with the people who already 'get' you; and how the source of the trouble we experience in one area of our lives often lies in a different, totally unexpected place. This is an episode about making change: recognising what's wrong and consciously deciding to take action. How can you get your friends or partner to support you to make that change? What's the difference between needing something and simply being open to it? And how can we make any of this change without being judgemental and beating ourselves up in the process? This one's personal. We hope it helps you reflect on where you're at in your own journey, too. Get in touch to let us know what came up for you, too – questions and reflections are always welcome!  Some of Philip's most powerful questions to ask yourself: <ul> <li>Where in my life am I settling?</li> <li>What am I tired of?</li> <li>Am I using my gift or my talent?</li> <li>What mask am I still wearing, and how would I describe it?</li> <li>What conversation am I avoiding?</li> <li>What part of me can the world not see?</li> </ul> Find Out More: <ul> <li>Check out our <a href="https://voicesinthedark.world/finding-your-gift-building-a-meaningful-life-philip-mckernan-interview/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> exclusive video interview with Philip</a>!</li> <li>The classic <a href="https://youtu.be/-4EDhdAHrOg" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">'It's Not About The Nail' video</a> – check it out!</li> </ul> Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

Finding Clarity In Life With Philip McKernan – Jon's Retreat Experience

Kyle Buller

As psychedelics increasingly hit the mainstream, we need to educate ourselves about their risks as well as their incredible potential for healing and growth. While the headlines keep on coming about psychedelics boosting creativity and 'curing' depression, there's far less accessible information available about the care and precautions involved in the research behind the news stories. That's where Psychedelics Today comes in, with a brilliantly-designed course on 'Navigating Psychedelics' (see below for our exclusive discount code!), dedicated to helping us approach, use and integrate psychedelics safely and to maximum effect. Kyle Buller, one half of the Psychedelics Today team, joins us this week to talk about the course, and why we need it. Kyle suffered a near-fatal snowboarding accident as a teenager. As he lay in the hospital, his life hanging in the balance, he had an unusual meeting with death. Instead of a confrontation or a desperate clawing for life, he found himself absolutely at peace... which made coming back to life a lot more complicated. He fell into depression, which would ultimately lead him to experiment with psychedelics in the effort to understand himself, life, and how to make sense of our fleeting existence on this planet. Since then, Kyle's gone on to train in Transpersonal Psychology and has taught a History of Psychedelics course at university level.  We dig into the history of psychedelic therapy, from the times when LSD was shipped out to psychotherapists around the world with the request that they find some kind of use for it, to the prohibition years and the Third Wave of Psychedelics which we're in today.  But this isn't just about mushrooms and LSD. This is about healing and personal growth. The Navigating Psychedelics course incorporates a wealth of knowledge from the explorations of Stanislav Grof into the body's ability to heal itself through breath- and bodywork. How much trauma do we hold onto in the cells of our body? And can meditative, trance-like states release repressed memories? All of this is hard work, not to be taken lightly. We have to confront our shadows if we're ever to integrate them. As Grof put it himself: 'The full experience of a negative emotion is the funeral pyre of that emotion' – Stanislav Grof  Including:  Setting and mindset for a psychedelic trip Finding and vetting your shaman A road-map for navigating psychedelic experience Understanding the risks and knowing what substance you've actually got  Find Out More:  Download a free psychedelics checklistfrom Psychedelics Today The  Navigating Psychedelics Course– use discount code VOICESINTHEDARK on checkout! Psychedelics Todaywebsite The work of Stanislav Grof    Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

As psychedelics increasingly hit the mainstream, we need to educate ourselves about their risks as well as their incredible potential for healing and growth. While the headlines keep on coming about psychedelics boosting creativity and 'curing' depression, there's far less accessible information available about the care and precautions involved in the research behind the news stories. That's where Psychedelics Today comes in, with a brilliantly-designed course on 'Navigating Psychedelics' (see below for our exclusive discount code!), dedicated to helping us approach, use and integrate psychedelics safely and to maximum effect. Kyle Buller, one half of the Psychedelics Today team, joins us this week to talk about the course, and why we need it. Kyle suffered a near-fatal snowboarding accident as a teenager. As he lay in the hospital, his life hanging in the balance, he had an unusual meeting with death. Instead of a confrontation or a desperate clawing for life, he found himself absolutely at peace... which made coming back to life a lot more complicated. He fell into depression, which would ultimately lead him to experiment with psychedelics in the effort to understand himself, life, and how to make sense of our fleeting existence on this planet. Since then, Kyle's gone on to train in Transpersonal Psychology and has taught a History of Psychedelics course at university level.  We dig into the history of psychedelic therapy, from the times when LSD was shipped out to psychotherapists around the world with the request that they find some kind of use for it, to the prohibition years and the Third Wave of Psychedelics which we're in today.  But this isn't just about mushrooms and LSD. This is about healing and personal growth. The Navigating Psychedelics course incorporates a wealth of knowledge from the explorations of Stanislav Grof into the body's ability to heal itself through breath- and bodywork. How much trauma do we hold onto in the cells of our body? And can meditative, trance-like states release repressed memories? All of this is hard work, not to be taken lightly. We have to confront our shadows if we're ever to integrate them. As Grof put it himself: 'The full experience of a negative emotion is the funeral pyre of that emotion' – Stanislav Grof Including: <ul> <li>Setting and mindset for a psychedelic trip</li> <li>Finding and vetting your shaman</li> <li>A road-map for navigating psychedelic experience</li> <li>Understanding the risks and knowing what substance you've actually got</li> </ul> Find Out More: <ul> <li>Download a <a href="http://psychedelicstoday.com/voices" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">free psychedelics checklist</a>from Psychedelics Today</li> <li>The <a href="https://psychedelicstoday.teachable.com/p/navigatingpsychedelics?affcode=80460_czw4hpoj" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Navigating Psychedelics Course</a>– use discount code VOICESINTHEDARK on checkout!</li> <li><a href="http://psychedelicstoday.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Psychedelics Today</a>website</li> <li>The work of <a href="http://www.stanislavgrof.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Stanislav Grof</a></li> </ul>   Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

How To Use Psychedelics Safely – With Psychedelics Today Host Kyle Buller

Consent. We intuitively think it should be simple – 'yes or no?' – but the Me Too movement and the maelstrom of Hollywood abuse scandals show us just how naive that idea is. So we need to talk about it. This episode we explore what consent is, how it works, and when it all gets confusing, strange, and scary. This is a very challenging subject to get into, because many people have had profoundly hurtful, damaging and confusing experiences directly related to issues of sexual consent (or lack thereof). So, we'd like to emphasise this is a conversation – we don't think we're 'right', but we'd like to share our thoughts, concerns and experiences in good faith, and hope you'll join the conversation to share your own perspectives over on our Facebook Discussion Group. By having more conversations about consent, we can try to understand it better – not least because so many of the problems that come up are a result of a breakdownin communication. First off, while there's many well-intention campaigns in full swing today trying to fight back against forceful sexual behaviour, in some quarters the pendulum has swung too far. Some people are effectively trying to make the world better by making 'sure' that sex is so carefully socially controlled that no one can ever end up in an ambiguous situation that could turn nasty. But sexuality and sexual behaviour areambiguous – we're exploring what we do (and might) want; we're trying to understand if someone else wants to have an experience with us, and we aregoing to make mistakes along the way. And we're all different. One person's sexual heaven is another's idea of absolute hell, and we need to remember that when we start trying to make too many rules and absolutes. Again, communication is fundamental. 'Just say no' isn't very good advice, however, because it doesn't give us a sense of just how difficult it is to do. Not simply out of fear, but because when someone is trying to force themselves on you, it can feel so surreal ('this can't really be happening') that you freeze and simply don't have the ability to speak or even to make sense of the situation. Jon shares some personal stories, including the time he was sexually assaulted in Moscow, and just how confusing that experience was for him. He also didn't realise until quite recently that he's still carrying the after-effects: he finds it very difficult to unleash his spontaneous sexual side without associating doing so with shame, danger, and fear. Does intoxication make it impossible to consent? Many people think so, but how realistic or reasonable is it to think that a couple of drinks makes you incapable of knowing your own mind? More troublingly, it seems that men aren't included in this reckoning: if a man and woman are both drunk, the man isn't usually considered to have been incapable of consent. What about when we dowant something to happen, but we've been so loaded with cultural shame around wanting sex (especially casual, in the moment sex) that we won't let ourselves experiment? Sometimes it's surprisingly difficult to say yeswithout getting caught up in internal stories about what sort of person you do or don't want to be. Sometimes we don't even know if a situation ispotentially sexual – how can we consent when we're not sure if the sexual dynamic is just in our heads? Again, Jon's got a personal story of an unexpected happy-ending massage which he still doesn't know what to think or feel about. We also dig into the issue of asymmetrical power relations, from Harvey Weinstein to Louis CK. This is not just about direct threats, but simply being in a position of authority over someone else means it's incredibly difficult for them to say no for fear of the consequences. To wrap things up, we've got some suggestions for ways to say no which are easier and less abrasive than 'just say no', but like we said at the top – we want to hear your feedback, thoughts and questions. This is an immensely complex subject, but one which it's absolutely essential we talk about, together.  Also Including:  White Knight Syndrome Language vs. intent Prostitute inductions Why fantasies shouldn't always come true  Find Out More:  Check out our  conversation with Carsie Blantonabout 'being open'  Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

Consent. We intuitively think it should be simple – 'yes or no?' – but the Me Too movement and the maelstrom of Hollywood abuse scandals show us just how naive that idea is. So we need to talk about it. This episode we explore what consent is, how it works, and when it all gets confusing, strange, and scary. This is a very challenging subject to get into, because many people have had profoundly hurtful, damaging and confusing experiences directly related to issues of sexual consent (or lack thereof). So, we'd like to emphasise this is a conversation – we don't think we're 'right', but we'd like to share our thoughts, concerns and experiences in good faith, and hope you'll join the conversation to share your own perspectives over on our <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/207829843133347/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Facebook Discussion Group</a>. By having more conversations about consent, we can try to understand it better – not least because so many of the problems that come up are a result of a breakdownin communication. First off, while there's many well-intention campaigns in full swing today trying to fight back against forceful sexual behaviour, in some quarters the pendulum has swung too far. Some people are effectively trying to make the world better by making 'sure' that sex is so carefully socially controlled that no one can ever end up in an ambiguous situation that could turn nasty. But sexuality and sexual behaviour areambiguous – we're exploring what we do (and might) want; we're trying to understand if someone else wants to have an experience with us, and we aregoing to make mistakes along the way. And we're all different. One person's sexual heaven is another's idea of absolute hell, and we need to remember that when we start trying to make too many rules and absolutes. Again, communication is fundamental. 'Just say no' isn't very good advice, however, because it doesn't give us a sense of just how difficult it is to do. Not simply out of fear, but because when someone is trying to force themselves on you, it can feel so surreal ('this can't really be happening') that you freeze and simply don't have the ability to speak or even to make sense of the situation. Jon shares some personal stories, including the time he was sexually assaulted in Moscow, and just how confusing that experience was for him. He also didn't realise until quite recently that he's still carrying the after-effects: he finds it very difficult to unleash his spontaneous sexual side without associating doing so with shame, danger, and fear. Does intoxication make it impossible to consent? Many people think so, but how realistic or reasonable is it to think that a couple of drinks makes you incapable of knowing your own mind? More troublingly, it seems that men aren't included in this reckoning: if a man and woman are both drunk, the man isn't usually considered to have been incapable of consent. What about when we dowant something to happen, but we've been so loaded with cultural shame around wanting sex (especially casual, in the moment sex) that we won't let ourselves experiment? Sometimes it's surprisingly difficult to say yeswithout getting caught up in internal stories about what sort of person you do or don't want to be. Sometimes we don't even know if a situation ispotentially sexual – how can we consent when we're not sure if the sexual dynamic is just in our heads? Again, Jon's got a personal story of an unexpected happy-ending massage which he still doesn't know what to think or feel about. We also dig into the issue of asymmetrical power relations, from Harvey Weinstein to Louis CK. This is not just about direct threats, but simply being in a position of authority over someone else means it's incredibly difficult for them to say no for fear of the consequences. To wrap things up, we've got some suggestions for ways to say no which are easier and less abrasive than 'just say no', but like we said at the top – we want to hear your feedback, thoughts and questions. This is an immensely complex subject, but one which it's absolutely essential we talk about, together.  Also Including: <ul> <li>White Knight Syndrome</li> <li>Language vs. intent</li> <li>Prostitute inductions</li> <li>Why fantasies shouldn't always come true</li> </ul> Find Out More: <ul> <li>Check out our <a href="https://voicesinthedark.world/being-open-with-special-guest-carsie-blanton-sex-relationships-series/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> conversation with Carsie Blanton</a>about 'being open'</li> </ul> Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

The Problems Of Consent [Sex & Relationships Series]

Saud Juman

These days Saud Juman is a clean-cut guy with a successful healthcare business dedicated to helping doctors and medical staff actually take care of themselves. But it wasn't always this way. Saud's journey has been one from darkness to light. Back when he was a college student, Saud fell into the underworld of Toronto club life, embroiled in a world of dangerous men and power games that he could scarcely have imagined when he set out to cover his university fees by DJing. But even though he would ultimately turn his back on that world of violence and intimidation, it taught him a lot about himself and about human nature. Like Robert Greene teaches us in The 48 Laws of Power, human nature is in many ways universal, and the underworld is a prime playground to witness interpersonal and social dynamics in their rawest form. There, the stakes are higher and the gloves are off. Your word must be your bond, and conflict resolution is an outright survival skill. We talk to Saud about what he learnt in the underworld that's now made him a successful entrepreneur and speaker, and what personal reinvention actually means. This isn't another saccharine redemption tale with a bow tied on it, but a look at the frightening, challenging, but also thrilling reality of transitioning from one world to another, finding yourself along the way. Personal reinvention is vital to success in any walk of life, but how can we do it without losing our identity along the way? As Saud's story shows, the process is one of turning the coin over to see the other side, rather than trying to pretend you're something completely 'new'. Knowing your own darkness is vital to be able to become your best self. We also play a couple of psychological games with Saud and discover that the seeds of his personal life adventure can be found in some of the books and stories he first connected with as a child; we discuss the importance of mentorship and the challenges of trying to find and impress mentors; and we explore where the balance between humility and hunger for success lies. As Saud puts it, 'The spectrum of light and dark exists in everybody' – life is discovering and working from where we are on that spectrum.   Also Including:  What do respect and success really mean? Running with the wrong crowd and how to find your way out Martial arts for healing Hunger and curiosity Intuition for other people's pain  Find Saud:  Email: saudjuman@gmail.com Website  Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

These days Saud Juman is a clean-cut guy with a successful healthcare business dedicated to helping doctors and medical staff actually take care of themselves. But it wasn't always this way. Saud's journey has been one from darkness to light. Back when he was a college student, Saud fell into the underworld of Toronto club life, embroiled in a world of dangerous men and power games that he could scarcely have imagined when he set out to cover his university fees by DJing. But even though he would ultimately turn his back on that world of violence and intimidation, it taught him a lot about himself and about human nature. Like Robert Greene teaches us in <a href="https://voicesinthedark.world/exploring-the-48-laws-of-power/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">The 48 Laws of Power</a>, human nature is in many ways universal, and the underworld is a prime playground to witness interpersonal and social dynamics in their rawest form. There, the stakes are higher and the gloves are off. Your word must be your bond, and conflict resolution is an outright survival skill. We talk to Saud about what he learnt in the underworld that's now made him a successful entrepreneur and speaker, and what personal reinvention actually means. This isn't another saccharine redemption tale with a bow tied on it, but a look at the frightening, challenging, but also thrilling reality of transitioning from one world to another, finding yourself along the way. Personal reinvention is vital to success in any walk of life, but how can we do it without losing our identity along the way? As Saud's story shows, the process is one of turning the coin over to see the other side, rather than trying to pretend you're something completely 'new'. Knowing your own darkness is vital to be able to become your best self. We also play a couple of psychological games with Saud and discover that the seeds of his personal life adventure can be found in some of the books and stories he first connected with as a child; we discuss the importance of mentorship and the challenges of trying to find and impress mentors; and we explore where the balance between humility and hunger for success lies. As Saud puts it, 'The spectrum of light and dark exists in everybody' – life is discovering and working from where we are on that spectrum.   Also Including: <ul> <li>What do respect and success really mean?</li> <li>Running with the wrong crowd and how to find your way out</li> <li>Martial arts for healing</li> <li>Hunger and curiosity</li> <li>Intuition for other people's pain</li> </ul> Find Saud: <ul> <li>Email: saudjuman@gmail.com</li> <li><a href="http://saudjuman.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Website</a></li> </ul> Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

The Accidental CEO: Saud Juman's Journey From Darkness To Light

The devil is in the detail... and that's the problem. This week is about not becoming obsessed with detail at the expense of actually doing or creating something yourself. It's about not trying to control things by over-planning and over-preparing, lest you want to spend your whole life getting 'ready' to live. Drawing on the horrifically-named Letter 45, 'On Sophistical Argumentation', we lay down a challenge for you to find the courage to put yourself out into the world and trysome of those plans we know you've been hatching all these years. Lucilius doesn't think he's ready, though. He's complaining that he doesn't have enough books to be the man he wants to be, so he comes to his mentor Seneca for help. But old man Seneca doesn't respond well: stop reading indiscriminately and stop trying to find the answers to your questions solely in the works of other people, he berates his charge. There is no perfect book or perfect solution that will fix all your problems and salve all your fears. Wanna know a secret? Whatever you read or experience, when you're asking good questions of yourself and world, answers start to turn up regardless. You've primed yourself, and suddenly ideas and insights can start cropping up when you're scanning the nutritional info on your cereal box, so there's no need to spend your life trying to read through your local library. But the temptation and allure of finding the one book or person who can lead us to salvation remains. It can be hard to avoid jumping on a guru's bandwagon at some point in our lives. Don't get us wrong, being excited and inspired by an author or speaker can be very positive... but not if you start entirely abdicating your mental faculties to them (as so many Jordan Peterson fans are doing these days). Nobody has all the answers, which is why Seneca refuses to send Lucilius a stash of his collected works. The aim is to seed your mind, not to fill it. The flip-side of this can be just as dangerous, though. Living a life based on the rejectionof a particular person or school of thought is like burning coal: it's not a sustainable or healthy fuel source for your life. You're not free if you're only defining yourself againstpeople you dislike – something Jon's experienced first hand in his own personal journey. And along with all that, Seneca still has time to exhort us not to wrongly label unhelpful perceptions in order to make ourselves feel better. Are you scared but calling it prudence? Are you a dick, but calling yourself strong-willed? And there's time to, well, debate the nature of time; whether 'good' and 'necessary' are always the same thing; and what the very best way of having sex in a library would be.   Also Including:  How to not drown in knowledge Does cleaning your room help people as much as Jordan Peterson would have us believe? Getting tricked by online marketers (time to tame your brain!) Stop calling time the only finite resource: it's subjective! Playing morality Jenga  Find Out More:  Jon's finally released his book! Check it out on Amazon USor UK! Come discuss the show in our Facebook Group Hit us up on Instagram! The full text for freeon WikiSource Our new Sex &amp; Relationshipsepisodes!  Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

The devil is in the detail... and that's the problem. This week is about not becoming obsessed with detail at the expense of actually doing or creating something yourself. It's about not trying to control things by over-planning and over-preparing, lest you want to spend your whole life getting 'ready' to live. Drawing on the horrifically-named Letter 45, 'On Sophistical Argumentation', we lay down a challenge for you to find the courage to put yourself out into the world and trysome of those plans we know you've been hatching all these years. Lucilius doesn't think he's ready, though. He's complaining that he doesn't have enough books to be the man he wants to be, so he comes to his mentor Seneca for help. But old man Seneca doesn't respond well: stop reading indiscriminately and stop trying to find the answers to your questions solely in the works of other people, he berates his charge. There is no perfect book or perfect solution that will fix all your problems and salve all your fears. Wanna know a secret? Whatever you read or experience, when you're asking good questions of yourself and world, answers start to turn up regardless. You've primed yourself, and suddenly ideas and insights can start cropping up when you're scanning the nutritional info on your cereal box, so there's no need to spend your life trying to read through your local library. But the temptation and allure of finding the one book or person who can lead us to salvation remains. It can be hard to avoid jumping on a guru's bandwagon at some point in our lives. Don't get us wrong, being excited and inspired by an author or speaker can be very positive... but not if you start entirely abdicating your mental faculties to them (as so many Jordan Peterson fans are doing these days). Nobody has all the answers, which is why Seneca refuses to send Lucilius a stash of his collected works. The aim is to seed your mind, not to fill it. The flip-side of this can be just as dangerous, though. Living a life based on the rejectionof a particular person or school of thought is like burning coal: it's not a sustainable or healthy fuel source for your life. You're not free if you're only defining yourself againstpeople you dislike – something Jon's experienced first hand in his own personal journey. And along with all that, Seneca still has time to exhort us not to wrongly label unhelpful perceptions in order to make ourselves feel better. Are you scared but calling it prudence? Are you a dick, but calling yourself strong-willed? And there's time to, well, debate the nature of time; whether 'good' and 'necessary' are always the same thing; and what the very best way of having sex in a library would be.   Also Including: <ul> <li>How to not drown in knowledge</li> <li>Does cleaning your room help people as much as Jordan Peterson would have us believe?</li> <li>Getting tricked by online marketers (time to tame your brain!)</li> <li>Stop calling time the only finite resource: it's subjective!</li> <li>Playing morality Jenga</li> </ul> Find Out More: <ul> <li>Jon's finally released his book! Check it out on Amazon <a href="https://amzn.to/2u2fIzI" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">US</a>or <a href="https://amzn.to/2lXnhEo" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">UK</a>!</li> <li>Come discuss the show in our <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/207829843133347" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Facebook Group</a></li> <li>Hit us up on <a href="https://www.instagram.com/vinthed.pod" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Instagram</a>!</li> <li><a href="https://en.wikisource.org/wiki/Moral_letters_to_Lucilius" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">The full text for free</a>on WikiSource</li> <li>Our new <a href="https://voicesinthedark.world/category/sex-relationships/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sex &amp; Relationships</a>episodes!</li> </ul> Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

The Modern Stoic #32: Drowning In Gurus

In a vast modern world, where we're constantly encountering strangers and trying to work out where they're coming from and how we can operate and cooperate together, we're living quintessentially unnatural lives compared to the tight-knit communities in which we evolved. It's as though we're living behind enemy lines: everyone's playing some kind of game we don't quite understand, saying one thing, but doing another; smiling while they hold a knife behind their backs... Help is at hand! This episode provides us with the vital tools we need to understand what people really think, really feel, and the motivations they're often trying frantically to hide. From unconscious body-language to the micro-expressions which betray their true feelings, Robert Greene dissects the role playing and hierarchy games that surround us daily. People are essentially emotional sieves: the emotions will leak out, whether they like it or not. And it's vitally important that we focus on that emotional leakage rather than believing the words alone. As ever, The Laws of Human Nature also turns the spotlight back on you. This episode drills down into what you'recommunicating without realising it. Robert forces us to recognise that we are all consummate actors, but we've forgotten that we're acting. We know certain tones and expressions that get results; we know how to present our 'best side' in a given situation. We play so many different roles all the time... But too often this means we become trapped in them, forgetting that they're all just a game based on the culture in which we're swimming.  Also Including:  Life lessons from drag queens Where accents come from The 'authenticity' trap Othello's Error and how to avoid it The dangers of 'Dude-Man-Bro Mode'  Get In Touch!  Discuss the episode over on our Facebook Discussion Group And you can find us on Instagram and Twitter Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world  Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

In a vast modern world, where we're constantly encountering strangers and trying to work out where they're coming from and how we can operate and cooperate together, we're living quintessentially unnatural lives compared to the tight-knit communities in which we evolved. It's as though we're living behind enemy lines: everyone's playing some kind of game we don't quite understand, saying one thing, but doing another; smiling while they hold a knife behind their backs... Help is at hand! This episode provides us with the vital tools we need to understand what people really think, really feel, and the motivations they're often trying frantically to hide. From unconscious body-language to the micro-expressions which betray their true feelings, Robert Greene dissects the role playing and hierarchy games that surround us daily. People are essentially emotional sieves: the emotions will leak out, whether they like it or not. And it's vitally important that we focus on that emotional leakage rather than believing the words alone. As ever, The Laws of Human Nature also turns the spotlight back on you. This episode drills down into what you'recommunicating without realising it. Robert forces us to recognise that we are all consummate actors, but we've forgotten that we're acting. We know certain tones and expressions that get results; we know how to present our 'best side' in a given situation. We play so many different roles all the time... But too often this means we become trapped in them, forgetting that they're all just a game based on the culture in which we're swimming.  Also Including: <ul> <li>Life lessons from drag queens</li> <li>Where accents come from</li> <li>The 'authenticity' trap</li> <li>Othello's Error and how to avoid it</li> <li>The dangers of 'Dude-Man-Bro Mode'</li> </ul> Get In Touch! <ul> <li>Discuss the episode over on our <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/207829843133347/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Facebook Discussion Group</a></li> <li>And you can find us on <a href="https://www.instagram.com/vinthed.pod/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="https://twitter.com/vinthed" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Twitter</a></li> <li>Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world</li> </ul> Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

The Laws of Human Nature 4: Mastering Non-Verbal Communication

In this episode, we explore what 'true character' means and how to identify, deal with and master the major personality types we encounter in the world. Apologies for the short notes – big changes are afoot at Voices in the Dark, which we'll be sharing with you soon!   Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

In this episode, we explore what 'true character' means and how to identify, deal with and master the major personality types we encounter in the world. Apologies for the short notes – big changes are afoot at Voices in the Dark, which we'll be sharing with you soon! Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

The Laws of Human Nature 5: Uncovering People's True Character

Welcome to the beginning of our new in-depth series on the work of Robert Greene, one of the most important and successful authors to explore what makes us human... and how we can all learn to do it better. Andrea describes Robert's new book, The Laws of Human Nature, as 'the distillation of how to be a human being... and not to let it get to you'. The book and this podcast series are the ultimate guide to fulfilling the eternal challenge to 'Know Thyself'. It's the handbook for learning to 'see the Matrix' and reshape the source code. We've all been born human, but we never got the instruction manual. Robert Greene defines 'human nature' essentially as the emotions and evolutionarily-developed instincts which continue to control us, largely without our conscious minds ever knowing it. This approach is what makes The Laws of Human Natureso different – and so much richer – than The 48 Laws of Power. Both volumes begin with the pointed assertion that we go through life often at the mercy of other people: the manipulative boss, the cheating spouse, or the two-faced friends. Unless we learn to read between the lines and not take everything and everyone at face value, we'll be victims of power games all our lives. But this book immediately flips the script and emphasises that we also have to work on ourselves. If the Laws of Power got a bad rep for allegedly making you a Machiavellian manipulator, this book forces you to confront your darkest sides with shocking and often painful honesty. We're all on the spectrum of narcissism; we all have a shadow side; we all have negative patterns that we fall into time and time again. Don't you want to escape those patterns and start rewriting the code of the Matrix you're currently trapped inside? As Robert says, if you ignore the laws – if you ignore your human nature – you're merely dooming yourself to a life spent repeating the same negative and destructive patterns. And if you try to hide from your own shadow, you become a virus in your own operating system, constantly in denial about your true nature. This series will also mark the end of your attempts to be 'authentic'. The cult of authenticity has been growing for some time in today's culture, but it's completely misleading: you're not only one thing, and you're not going to get far in life or make many friends if you're unable to adapt your behaviour to different contexts. Finding your 'identity' is one thing; believing that you then need to wrap it up in a neat bow and shove it down people's throats is something else... That's not what The Laws of Human Natureis about. As we continue Voices in the Dark's mission of Learning How To Human, this series promises to help you become a more intuitive, empathetic person, whom others will want to be around. This is about recognising your darkness and becoming an integrated, actualised human being. As Robert puts it, you are about to begin an apprenticeship in human nature. So it's time to don your oxygen mask before helping others... The only downside is that this oxygen mask is filled with the darkest parts of your own shadow! Strap in – things are about to get real... Also Including:  Your shadow side, and how to find it Cat psychology as the key to our own neurology Who are you without other people? The difference between manners and etiquette – and why it matters If J.K. Rowling wrote a self-help book Are Autistic people living their own shadow?  Get In Touch!  Discuss the episode over on our Facebook Discussion Group And you can find us on Instagramand Twitter Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world  Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

Welcome to the beginning of our new in-depth series on the work of Robert Greene, one of the most important and successful authors to explore what makes us human... and how we can all learn to do it better. Andrea describes Robert's new book, The Laws of Human Nature, as 'the distillation of how to be a human being... and not to let it get to you'. The book and this podcast series are the ultimate guide to fulfilling the eternal challenge to 'Know Thyself'. It's the handbook for learning to 'see the Matrix' and reshape the source code. We've all been born human, but we never got the instruction manual. Robert Greene defines 'human nature' essentially as the emotions and evolutionarily-developed instincts which continue to control us, largely without our conscious minds ever knowing it. This approach is what makes The Laws of Human Natureso different – and so much richer – than The 48 Laws of Power. Both volumes begin with the pointed assertion that we go through life often at the mercy of other people: the manipulative boss, the cheating spouse, or the two-faced friends. Unless we learn to read between the lines and not take everything and everyone at face value, we'll be victims of power games all our lives. But this book immediately flips the script and emphasises that we also have to work on ourselves. If the Laws of Power got a bad rep for allegedly making you a Machiavellian manipulator, this book forces you to confront your darkest sides with shocking and often painful honesty. We're all on the spectrum of narcissism; we all have a shadow side; we all have negative patterns that we fall into time and time again. Don't you want to escape those patterns and start rewriting the code of the Matrix you're currently trapped inside? As Robert says, if you ignore the laws – if you ignore your human nature – you're merely dooming yourself to a life spent repeating the same negative and destructive patterns. And if you try to hide from your own shadow, you become a virus in your own operating system, constantly in denial about your true nature. This series will also mark the end of your attempts to be 'authentic'. The cult of authenticity has been growing for some time in today's culture, but it's completely misleading: you're not only one thing, and you're not going to get far in life or make many friends if you're unable to adapt your behaviour to different contexts. Finding your 'identity' is one thing; believing that you then need to wrap it up in a neat bow and shove it down people's throats is something else... That's not what The Laws of Human Natureis about. As we continue Voices in the Dark's mission of Learning How To Human, this series promises to help you become a more intuitive, empathetic person, whom others will want to be around. This is about recognising your darkness and becoming an integrated, actualised human being. As Robert puts it, you are about to begin an apprenticeship in human nature. So it's time to don your oxygen mask before helping others... The only downside is that this oxygen mask is filled with the darkest parts of your own shadow! Strap in – things are about to get real... Also Including: <ul> <li>Your shadow side, and how to find it</li> <li>Cat psychology as the key to our own neurology</li> <li>Who are you without other people?</li> <li>The difference between manners and etiquette – and why it matters</li> <li>If J.K. Rowling wrote a self-help book</li> <li>Are Autistic people living their own shadow?</li> </ul> Get In Touch! <ul> <li>Discuss the episode over on our <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/207829843133347/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Facebook Discussion Group</a></li> <li>And you can find us on <a href="https://www.instagram.com/vinthed.pod/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Instagram</a>and <a href="https://twitter.com/vinthed" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Twitter</a></li> <li>Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world</li> </ul> Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

The Laws of Human Nature 1: Start To See The Matrix

This episode we get together to discuss a variety of topics, ultimately centring around the seeming decline of popular culture into endless sequels and entertainment-by-algorithm. Where did it all go wrong, and why are so many of us still comfort-eating the shit out of it? In the wake of the Golden Globes and the release of Once Upon a Time in Hollywood we pause to reflect on why so many contemporary films and TV shows are so unconvincing. In a world saturated by 'cultural content', are we (and the actors themselves) becoming trapped in a hall of mirrors, constantly trying to be self-referential rather than capturing the moment as it unfolds? Culture by algorithm is a shitty way to live, and we reflect instead on the joys of the artistic creations that we've loved and lost ourselves in.   Also Including:  The disturbing story of Britain's most prolific rapist What are 'Type A' and 'Type B' personalities – and do they matter? Why Jon is considering doing a nude photoshoot Andrea's distaste for The Rock Realising you're not everyone's cup of tea  Get In Touch!  Discuss the episode over on our Facebook Discussion Group And you can find us on Instagram and Twitter Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world  Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

This episode we get together to discuss a variety of topics, ultimately centring around the seeming decline of popular culture into endless sequels and entertainment-by-algorithm. Where did it all go wrong, and why are so many of us still comfort-eating the shit out of it? In the wake of the Golden Globes and the release of Once Upon a Time in Hollywood we pause to reflect on why so many contemporary films and TV shows are so unconvincing. In a world saturated by 'cultural content', are we (and the actors themselves) becoming trapped in a hall of mirrors, constantly trying to be self-referential rather than capturing the moment as it unfolds? Culture by algorithm is a shitty way to live, and we reflect instead on the joys of the artistic creations that we've loved and lost ourselves in.   Also Including: <ul> <li>The disturbing story of Britain's most prolific rapist</li> <li>What are 'Type A' and 'Type B' personalities – and do they matter?</li> <li>Why Jon is considering doing a nude photoshoot</li> <li>Andrea's distaste for The Rock</li> <li>Realising you're not everyone's cup of tea</li> </ul> Get In Touch! <ul> <li>Discuss the episode over on our <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/207829843133347/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Facebook Discussion Group</a></li> <li>And you can find us on <a href="https://www.instagram.com/vinthed.pod/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="https://twitter.com/vinthed" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Twitter</a></li> <li>Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world</li> </ul> Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

What Happened To Culture?

Jon's back in London because, in strange symmetry, his grandfather died shortly after Andrea's. So, we decided to make a mixed episode in which we finish off Think &amp; Grow Richand add some further reflections on what life is in the face of death and how we become who we are, with or without the aid of self-help. In short, we've decided it's time to take Napoleon Hill to the wood shed and put him down. His book is the foundation stone of the self-help industry, and as such it's also a raw source which highlights many of that genre's shortcomings. In reading it, we realise we've reached a point in our lives where it feels like we've seen all the self-help genre has to offer. There's certainly still plenty of space for books which explore the human condition, philosophically, psychologically and otherwise, but when it comes to self-programming and trying to find The One True System to Achieve Your Dreams... there's only so much this field has to offer. More problematically, what it offers always seems to be a one-size-fits-all approach which ignores the rich variety of human experience. In truth, not all brains work the same. Some people can't visualise, for example, and others are never going to be inspired by having the sergeant-major-yelling-at-you-until-you-succeed model. And even the same people need to take different approaches according to the context they're in. So, while there's nuggets of wisdom to be garnered from Napoleon Hill and others, we still need to remember that, above all, being able to flow – to be like water, as Bruce Lee put it – is the most important quality for leading the good life. In the aftermath of self-help, Andrea has some simple but very real life advice for us to consider: Try to keep going as long as you can. Try not to get too down, but it's fine if you do. Try be as likeable as possible. And, someday, you might make it. That's it – the rest is just decoration. If people like you and you keep going, you might get lucky enough to know the right person at the right time for one of your opportunities to pan out. That's about it; that's how life works. – Andrea That might not sound as seductive as a 5-step system or the secret key that unlocks the mysteries of success, but maybe it's a healthier, truer perspective which doesn't pile on the pressure so much and make us judge ourselves so harshly. And then it's time to consider life through the lens of death. Jon shares the emotional experience of being at his grandfather's funeral and walking around his house, looking at the artefacts of a life of a person who's now gone forever. We talk about how to make sense of ourselves in relation to others, and what it means to remember a person accurately when we can never truly know the 'complete' person. Jon's dad gave a beautiful speech at the funeral, about how he's coming to terms with his relationship to his own father and what it feels like to see his face in the mirror each morning. We've never finished a podcast with both of us in tears before, so this one's a special episode for us. Thanks for listening.   Also Including:  Long-distance (podcasting) relationships Is self-help just a religion for the self-involved? When being open-minded is a bad thing How emotions shape the stories we tell ourselves (and why we should ignore them)  Get In Touch!  Discuss the episode over on our Facebook Discussion Group And you can find us on Instagramand Twitter Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world  Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

Jon's back in London because, in strange symmetry, his grandfather died shortly after Andrea's. So, we decided to make a mixed episode in which we finish off Think &amp; Grow Richand add some further reflections on what life is in the face of death and how we become who we are, with or without the aid of self-help. In short, we've decided it's time to take Napoleon Hill to the wood shed and put him down. His book is the foundation stone of the self-help industry, and as such it's also a raw source which highlights many of that genre's shortcomings. In reading it, we realise we've reached a point in our lives where it feels like we've seen all the self-help genre has to offer. There's certainly still plenty of space for books which explore the human condition, philosophically, psychologically and otherwise, but when it comes to self-programming and trying to find The One True System to Achieve Your Dreams... there's only so much this field has to offer. More problematically, what it offers always seems to be a one-size-fits-all approach which ignores the rich variety of human experience. In truth, not all brains work the same. Some people can't visualise, for example, and others are never going to be inspired by having the sergeant-major-yelling-at-you-until-you-succeed model. And even the same people need to take different approaches according to the context they're in. So, while there's nuggets of wisdom to be garnered from Napoleon Hill and others, we still need to remember that, above all, being able to flow – to be like water, as Bruce Lee put it – is the most important quality for leading the good life. In the aftermath of self-help, Andrea has some simple but very real life advice for us to consider: Try to keep going as long as you can. Try not to get too down, but it's fine if you do. Try be as likeable as possible. And, someday, you might make it. That's it – the rest is just decoration. If people like you and you keep going, you might get lucky enough to know the right person at the right time for one of your opportunities to pan out. That's about it; that's how life works. – Andrea That might not sound as seductive as a 5-step system or the secret key that unlocks the mysteries of success, but maybe it's a healthier, truer perspective which doesn't pile on the pressure so much and make us judge ourselves so harshly. And then it's time to consider life through the lens of death. Jon shares the emotional experience of being at his grandfather's funeral and walking around his house, looking at the artefacts of a life of a person who's now gone forever. We talk about how to make sense of ourselves in relation to others, and what it means to remember a person accurately when we can never truly know the 'complete' person. Jon's dad gave a beautiful speech at the funeral, about how he's coming to terms with his relationship to his own father and what it feels like to see his face in the mirror each morning. We've never finished a podcast with both of us in tears before, so this one's a special episode for us. Thanks for listening.   Also Including: <ul> <li>Long-distance (podcasting) relationships</li> <li>Is self-help just a religion for the self-involved?</li> <li>When being open-minded is a bad thing</li> <li>How emotions shape the stories we tell ourselves (and why we should ignore them)</li> </ul> Get In Touch! <ul> <li>Discuss the episode over on our <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/207829843133347/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Facebook Discussion Group</a></li> <li>And you can find us on <a href="https://www.instagram.com/vinthed.pod/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Instagram</a>and <a href="https://twitter.com/vinthed" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Twitter</a></li> <li>Or email us: hello@voicesinthedark.world</li> </ul> Be Silly. Be Kind. Be Weird.

Think & Grow Rich: The End of Self Help?

Voices in the Dark, what's it all about... Recorded during a massive thunderstorm over London (in mid-summer, of course), Jon and Dre dive into what Voices in the Dark is all about; why we're exploring the 48 Laws of Power; what our other shows are going to be... and who the hell are we, anyway? In a nutshell, we're 'just' exploring the human condition: what it is to be a human beings and the problems we face both as individuals and as a society. In the process we talk about Dre's journey from severe autism to learning how 'to people' and Jon's struggles to overcome depression and rock-bottom self-esteem. We also introduce Jon's solo interview-conversation show, Talking the Walk, which you'll find in your Voices in the Dark stream when you subscribe! Check out the first episode here, with the editor of High Existence, Martijn Schirp. In This Episode:  How society conditions us to follow 'the rules'... but the rules are lies Our experiences of living in different cultures (of power) – Italy, New Zealand, the USA, Russia, Ukraine and elsewhere What drew us to Robert Greene's works? How have they helped us deal with autism and depression? The world of 'pickup' and what it really means to seduce people If you were a children's toy, what would you be? On not hugging autistic people... or Jon The real and harmful effects of not losing your virginity early The complexities (or not) of consent The dance of seduction and why we all, ultimately, want to join in What does 'Voices in the Dark' mean to us?  Mentioned in the Episode:  Robert Greene's masterpieces, The 48 Laws of Power; The 33 Strategies of War; Mastery; and The Art of Seduction The '10,000 hour rule' was popularised in Malcolm Gladwell's book, Blink Jon's experiences with Ayahuasca, which he made a series of vlogs about Neil Strauss's controversial and brilliant book, The Game, and its remarkable sequel, The Truth The London Real podcast Neo, the homeless singer who Jon's interviewed for Talking the Walk. Check out his Facebook page and buy his beautiful music here The stunning Radiohead track, Reckoner and Jon's favourite remix of it Ryan Holiday's books, Ego is the Enemy (check out Jon's article on it, too!), and The Obstacle is the Way 

Voices in the Dark, what's it all about... Recorded during a massive thunderstorm over London (in mid-summer, of course), Jon and Dre dive into what Voices in the Dark is all about; why we're exploring the 48 Laws of Power; what our other shows are going to be... and who the hell are we, anyway? In a nutshell, we're 'just' exploring the human condition: what it is to be a human beings and the problems we face both as individuals and as a society. In the process we talk about Dre's journey from severe autism to learning how 'to people' and Jon's struggles to overcome depression and rock-bottom self-esteem. We also introduce Jon's solo interview-conversation show, Talking the Walk, which you'll find in your Voices in the Dark stream when you subscribe! Check out the <a href="http://voicesinthedark.world/2016/07/15/talking-the-walk-01-seeking-a-high-existence-with-martijn-schirp/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">first episode here</a>, with the editor of <a href="http://highexistence.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">High Existence</a>, Martijn Schirp. In This Episode: <ul> <li>How society conditions us to follow 'the rules'... but the rules are lies</li> <li>Our experiences of living in different cultures (of power) – Italy, New Zealand, the USA, Russia, Ukraine and elsewhere</li> <li>What drew us to Robert Greene's works? How have they helped us deal with autism and depression?</li> <li>The world of 'pickup' and what it really means to seduce people</li> <li>If you were a children's toy, what would you be?</li> <li>On not hugging autistic people... or Jon</li> <li>The real and harmful effects of not losing your virginity early</li> <li>The complexities (or not) of consent</li> <li>The dance of seduction and why we all, ultimately, want to join in</li> <li>What does 'Voices in the Dark' mean to us?</li> </ul> Mentioned in the Episode: <ul> <li>Robert Greene's masterpieces, The 48 Laws of Power; The 33 Strategies of War; Mastery; and The Art of Seduction</li> <li>The '10,000 hour rule' was popularised in Malcolm Gladwell's book, Blink</li> <li>Jon's experiences with Ayahuasca, which he made <a href="https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL4Zj8EavT9vs7delTdUCbJvjK2NS5N_HD" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">a series of vlogs</a> about</li> <li>Neil Strauss's controversial and brilliant book, The Game, and its remarkable sequel, The Truth</li> <li>The <a href="https://londonrealacademy.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">London Real</a> podcast</li> <li>Neo, the homeless singer who Jon's interviewed for Talking the Walk. Check out his <a href="https://www.facebook.com/Neohomelessman/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Facebook page</a> and buy his <a href="http://neohomelessman.bandcamp.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">beautiful music here</a></li> <li>The stunning Radiohead track, <a href="https://youtu.be/NPW-eo0aE_g" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Reckoner</a> and Jon's favourite <a href="https://youtu.be/R7WuPzccfF8" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">remix</a> of it</li> <li>Ryan Holiday's books, Ego is the Enemy (check out <a href="http://voicesinthedark.world/2016/07/12/if-ego-is-my-enemy-is-depression-my-ally/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Jon's article</a> on it, too!), and The Obstacle is the Way</li> </ul>

Episode 0: Meet Jon & Dre - What's It All About

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