Charles Fai's guest appearances

Charles Fai

Wellness Renaissance Podcast

David Allen

Brené Brown

Caitlin Doughty

Dave Warnock

August McLaughlin

Tim Minchin

Gaelynn Lea

Matt Zinman

John Moder

David Bloom

Chris Godsey

Steve Stern

Michele Perron

Shannon May

Jean Sumner

OwlTail

We continue our conversation about how to move towards equity, what it means to be an Ally and Charles’ experiences of living as a black man.   He shares getting his first and only speeding ticket, being questioned by police when getting into his own car… multiple times, being questioned as to what business he has in this neighborhood… 5 blocks from his home… even being criticized about the music he was playing to calm his nerves from being pulled over by the police that same night on his way home.  And, he shares his story of being held at gunpoint and what got him through; what he had to do inside his head to keep himself calm to increase his chances of seeing his wife and unborn child again… and this for not actually doing anything wrong.  If all of this sounds ridiculous and exhausting… imagine living it.  This is his actual life!  The one he gets to experience and that lives inside his head as he navigates life on a daily bases.  Statistics show that police are more likely to use lethal force on a black man for the same behavior as a white man… for that same behavior.   (Interesting when you hear his story about getting his speeding ticket.) How do we understand and accept that racism has been a part of our culture and training… so it is not surprising that it might be how we behave.One question is… what do we do with that information? How do we integrate NEW information… about situations, about people, etc.  How do we help support ourselves, those around us and our communities to change things… not just when people of color are around? I asked Charles about the word Colorblind.  He posed a great question to help us see how this concept and term does not actually play out when the rubber meats the road.  How it does not serve him or our communities.  A beautiful example and question about curb cuts to help us understand perspectives and what we it means to be an ally… equitable.“Do you know how many blocks have curb side cuts?”   IF you had to travel in a wheel chair… that information would be priceless to guide where you travel and how you navigate your needs, wants and life.  Little things make big changes

We continue our conversation about how to move towards equity, what it means to be an Ally and Charles’ experiences of living as a black man.   He shares getting his first and only speeding ticket, being questioned by police when getting into his own car… multiple times, being questioned as to what business he has in this neighborhood… 5 blocks from his home… even being criticized about the music he was playing to calm his nerves from being pulled over by the police that same night on his way home.  And, he shares his story of being held at gunpoint and what got him through; what he had to do inside his head to keep himself calm to increase his chances of seeing his wife and unborn child again… and this for not actually doing anything wrong. If all of this sounds ridiculous and exhausting… imagine living it.  This is his actual life!  The one he gets to experience and that lives inside his head as he navigates life on a daily bases. Statistics show that police are more likely to use lethal force on a black man for the same behavior as a white man… for that same behavior.   (Interesting when you hear his story about getting his speeding ticket.) How do we understand and accept that racism has been a part of our culture and training… so it is not surprising that it might be how we behave. One question is… what do we do with that information? How do we integrate NEW information… about situations, about people, etc. How do we help support ourselves, those around us and our communities to change things… not just when people of color are around? I asked Charles about the word Colorblind.  He posed a great question to help us see how this concept and term does not actually play out when the rubber meats the road.  How it does not serve him or our communities. A beautiful example and question about curb cuts to help us understand perspectives and what we it means to be an ally… equitable. “Do you know how many blocks have curb side cuts?”   IF you had to travel in a wheel chair… that information would be priceless to guide where you travel and how you navigate your needs, wants and life. Little things make big changes

Episode 139 – Experiences and Life as a Black Man – Charles Fai and Shannon May – Part 2

A timely discussion I am so grateful for the opportunity to have.   Charles Fai grew up in Cameroon, West Africa. Shannon May was born and raised in Minnesota. They met during her trip to Cameroon.  They call Duluth home, where they both have businesses and raise their 3 children.  Charles works as a mental health therapist, soccer (football) fan and coach. He is a trainer of the Duluth Police Department on Implicit Bias and working with people who experience mental illness.  Shannon is a Naturopathic Doctor with her practice in Duluth.  Many things have stuck in my head after recording this conversation.  One of them is this… His daily mantra to himself when he wakes up in the morning. The first thing on his mind. Then, listen to his story that follows… the story that built that mantra… that prayer. Shannon shares her experience of living in Cameroon where she was the first white person some had ever seen.   Raising children… creating for them a home… a place for bliss and peace – And then preparing them for the world and how the color of their skin can change perceptions. She makes a great point…. we can accept kids…. but something shifts as they get older… especially boys.  How do we start to make REAL and MEANINGFUL changes? That thread is woven through our conversation.  Charles challenges us to think about our words, our division of community.  Is it a problem for the “black communities” to figure out?  The danger of thinking “communities of color” are separate from the community, the town, the city. Who has the power to make change? Charles gives us a great way to think about advantages.  The Super Bowl… our team and race. Where do we… all of us.. have advantages?  How do we honor those advantages and also recognize that we have them? What does it mean to go from Sympathizer to Ally? Food for thought…     Do our businesses reflect our population?    Seeing diversity as an asset not a liability    What are business owners doing to attract people of color to their business as employers?     How can we create opportunities for people of color to be heard… (Beyond the protests.) Little changes can add up to big changes… if we invest ourselves a little.  How do we start those changes that need to come from within ourselves and inside our communities? Please join us for part two as we dive deeper into this conversation.Charles shares his experiences. Some are intense… and some are all too consistent. When you are a black man pulled over by the police. Being pulled over when you are the only sober person in your group leaving the bar… multiple times.Getting through the stress, the fear, the frustration…  being held at gun point to make sure he made it home to see his wife and unborn child… for having done nothing wrong. We talk about the concept of being “colorblind” We, of course, continue the conversation of how we make the world a more equitable place.   YouTube Videos LEARN MORE…about the work Charles is doing with Duluth, MN police and Implicit Bias Training Intersections: Charles Faihttps://youtu.be/K6ALwSXtIbg Intersections: Charles Fai, Part 2https://youtu.be/-A7zMbTgjHs

A timely discussion I am so grateful for the opportunity to have. Charles Fai grew up in Cameroon, West Africa. Shannon May was born and raised in Minnesota. They met during her trip to Cameroon.  They call Duluth home, where they both have businesses and raise their 3 children. Charles works as a mental health therapist, soccer (football) fan and coach. He is a trainer of the Duluth Police Department on Implicit Bias and working with people who experience mental illness. Shannon is a Naturopathic Doctor with her practice in Duluth. Many things have stuck in my head after recording this conversation. One of them is this… His daily mantra to himself when he wakes up in the morning. The first thing on his mind. Then, listen to his story that follows… the story that built that mantra… that prayer. Shannon shares her experience of living in Cameroon where she was the first white person some had ever seen.   Raising children… creating for them a home… a place for bliss and peace – And then preparing them for the world and how the color of their skin can change perceptions. She makes a great point…. we can accept kids…. but something shifts as they get older… especially boys. How do we start to make REAL and MEANINGFUL changes? That thread is woven through our conversation. Charles challenges us to think about our words, our division of community. Is it a problem for the “black communities” to figure out? The danger of thinking “communities of color” are separate from the community, the town, the city. Who has the power to make change? Charles gives us a great way to think about advantages. The Super Bowl… our team and race. Where do we… all of us.. have advantages? How do we honor those advantages and also recognize that we have them? What does it mean to go from Sympathizer to Ally? Food for thought… Do our businesses reflect our population? Seeing diversity as an asset not a liability What are business owners doing to attract people of color to their business as employers? How can we create opportunities for people of color to be heard… (Beyond the protests.) Little changes can add up to big changes… if we invest ourselves a little. How do we start those changes that need to come from within ourselves and inside our communities? Please join us for part two as we dive deeper into this conversation. Charles shares his experiences. Some are intense… and some are all too consistent. When you are a black man pulled over by the police. Being pulled over when you are the only sober person in your group leaving the bar… multiple times. Getting through the stress, the fear, the frustration… being held at gun point to make sure he made it home to see his wife and unborn child… for having done nothing wrong. We talk about the concept of being “colorblind” We, of course, continue the conversation of how we make the world a more equitable place. <h4>YouTube Videos</h4> LEARN MORE… about the work Charles is doing with Duluth, MN police and Implicit Bias Training Intersections: Charles Fai <a href="https://youtu.be/K6ALwSXtIbg" rel="noreferrer noopener nofollow" target="_blank">https://youtu.be/K6ALwSXtIbg</a> Intersections: Charles Fai, Part 2 <a href="https://youtu.be/-A7zMbTgjHs" rel="noreferrer noopener nofollow" target="_blank">https://youtu.be/-A7zMbTgjHs</a>

Episode 138 – When You Wake Up a Black Man – Charles Fai and Shannon May – Part 1