Rob Reiher's guest appearances

Rob Reiher

Practical Intuition with Kay

Sunshine Parenting

REVIVE - Marriage, Family, Parenting

Jessica Lahey

Maureen Healy

Julie Lythcott-Haims

Devorah Heitner

Catherine Pearlman

Michael Reichert

Charlie Hoehn

Jim Burns

Tina Payne Bryson

Jocelyn Sams

Mark McGuinness

Jonathan Fields

Katherine Reynolds Lewis

Dan Weissmann

Skip Prichard

OwlTail

Wayne Yercha

Will you be my Valentine? I have a special gift exclusively for newsletter subscribers… Click here to read my most recent newsletter (all about Valentine's Day) and to subscribe! "Schools are way, way behind the times when it comes to what kids need today," one of today's guests, educational psychologist Dr. Rob Reiher, shares during our conversation. Rob and his podcast cohost, Wayne Yercha, teamed up because they saw a disparity not just in schools, but in children's entertainment. So they created two shows! Live Above the Noise is the "for parents" show about helping kids find, and listen to, their inner voice – and speaking personally, it's a show that survived my 2019 digital reset because they give real insight into how we can best raise our little kids. Their other show, Shieldstar Knights, debuts this week! It's an action-adventure show for kids ages 8 to 12, and differs from most other kids' entertainment by solving problems in other ways besides violence. (It's definitely geared towards kids between eight and 12, it would be pretty scary for younger children! Maybe listen, before you introduce it to your kids, just to be sure : ) We dig into both, and lots more, in this episode of We Turned Out Okay. Join us! Click weturnedoutokay.com/317 for everything we talk about in today's episode : ) Sign up for my Weekly Parenting Newsletter Each week I send out a couple parenting newsletters, to help you stay sane while raising your kiddos. (This one is about enjoying Valentine's Day when you've got littles running around and includes the link to become a subscriber yourself.) I just wrapped up a series on "Kids gone sideways," so you can learn what to do when even the basics are a challenge! Useful stuff. Click weturnedoutokay.com/weekly so it zooms right into your inbox each week! Click here for the We Turned Out Okay Facebook group. And if you need some extra support for the tough parts of your parenting journey, join the private coaching community that I run! Click here to find out more, and to join.

Will you be my Valentine? I have a special gift exclusively for newsletter subscribers… <a href="https://Weturnedoutokay.com/valentines-day-with-kiddos" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" target="_blank">Click here</a> to read my most recent newsletter (all about Valentine's Day) and to subscribe! "Schools are way, way behind the times when it comes to what kids need today," one of today's guests, educational psychologist Dr. Rob Reiher, shares during our conversation. Rob and his podcast cohost, Wayne Yercha, teamed up because they saw a disparity not just in schools, but in children's entertainment. So they created two shows! Live Above the Noise is the "for parents" show about helping kids find, and listen to, their inner voice – and speaking personally, it's a show that survived my 2019 digital reset because they give real insight into how we can best raise our little kids. Their other show, Shieldstar Knights, debuts this week! It's an action-adventure show for kids ages 8 to 12, and differs from most other kids' entertainment by solving problems in other ways besides violence. (It's definitely geared towards kids between eight and 12, it would be pretty scary for younger children! Maybe listen, before you introduce it to your kids, just to be sure : ) We dig into both, and lots more, in this episode of We Turned Out Okay. Join us! Click <a href="https://weturnedoutokay.com/317" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" target="_blank">weturnedoutokay.com/317</a> for everything we talk about in today's episode : ) Sign up for my Weekly Parenting Newsletter Each week I send out a couple parenting newsletters, to help you stay sane while raising your kiddos. (<a href="https://Weturnedoutokay.com/valentines-day-with-kiddos" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" target="_blank">This one is about enjoying Valentine's Day when you've got littles running around</a> and includes the link to become a subscriber yourself.) I just wrapped up a series on "<a href="https://weturnedoutokay.com/hangry-meltdowns-and-self-worth/" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" target="_blank">Kids gone sideways</a>," so you can learn what to do when even the basics are a challenge! Useful stuff. <a href="https://weturnedoutokay.com/weekly" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" target="_blank">Click weturnedoutokay.com/weekly</a> so it zooms right into your inbox each week! <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/1607987166145505/" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" target="_blank">Click here</a> for the We Turned Out Okay Facebook group. And if you need some extra support for the tough parts of your parenting journey, join the private coaching community that I run! <a href="https://Weturnedoutokay.com/joinNPC" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" target="_blank">Click here</a> to find out more, and to join.

317: What kids need today with guests Dr. Rob Reiher and Wayne Yercha of the Live Above the Noise podcast

In this episode, I'm chatting with Dr. Rob Reiher, co-host of the Live Above the Noise podcast. Dr. Reiher is a developmental and educational psychologist, media expert and author. We discuss the escalating impact of technology, media, and consumerism and the overload on children, families, and society. Dr. Reiher focuses on educating parents on the importance of teaching children to live above the noise and distraction of our world. BIG IDEAS  Dr. Reiher's career began in product development but it soon became clear to him that the corporate world was more interested in profits than psychology. When your work is not congruent with your beliefs, it can cause harm emotionally and physically. We need to live our values. Humans are hard-wired to be distracted and are wired with blind spots. The Inner IQ stands for Inner Integral Qualities – a critical set of inner qualities (such as self-management) that protect and prepare our children for the future. There are 3 IQ categories and each category breaks down into 3 sub-categories:  your child's character  identity, values, and virtues   your child's competence  self-management, meaning, and mastery   your child's communication system  "me-com", "we-com", and "it-com"     All nine of those dimensions are critical for an individual's wellbeing and provide a framework to be able to see what's missing or breaking down. Integral Qualities are not the same as Intellectual Quotient, which is what is measured in schools. Because schools are they are not equipped to address the negative impact of toxic tech media and consumerism, they often contribute to the problem. It is ultimately up to parents to prepare their kids with these important internal qualities (IQ). It is important we learn to filter, manage and design our time, which can be broken down into 5 different types:  TCB - Taking Care of Business time Toxic Time - when you feel emotional or upset Coping Time - dealing with stress by distraction  Enrichment Time Inside Time - self-talk, inner time   Take the time to self-reflect, or use the 5 Step PAUSE:  P - Prepare A - Attune U - Uncover S -  Shift E - Elevate   The way you spend your time directly affects your wellbeing. For children to thrive and have fulfilling lives, we need to help them to live above the noise.  QUOTES Audrey: "I think it's a really important concept to teach kids to be more aware of what they're feeling, how things are impacting them and an ability to see when, for example, something is addicting versus just entertaining." Rob: "We have an infinite appetite for distraction...and its a good thing in some ways. But when it gets manipulated by companies, then you have to make a decision. The combination of an infinite appetite for distraction and over 180 blind spots, creates the background for major trade-offs." Audrey: "It seems like the whole goal is to help parents to understand how they can protect their children and prepare them to live in this world that is an endless stream of distractions." Rob: "If we look at wellbeing as the goal, not happiness, and then if we go underneath wellbeing and we say, what do we know in positive psychology about how wellbeing works, we can create a framework for parents that would give them a way to keep track of the dimensions of wellbeing that may be in jeopardy." Rob: "It's like it is the hardest thing in the world, in this overwhelming society, to say, what do I pay attention to? What is important? There are so many people saying so many things." Rob: "Let's redefine what a smart kid is and understand that from a wellbeing perspective, as opposed to what schools still keep in place as an IQ. Unfortunately, the traditional IQ intelligence quotient that our schools promote does not adequately address the growing negative impact of toxic tech media and consumerism on our children's development. School alone is simply not enough to prepare them for a fulfilling future." Rob: "I'm in love with your camp concept because that's one of the places (where kids can develop the good kind of IQ) being away from home, getting that break from technology." Rob: "Time is our biggest issue now and everybody's really struggling with their time. Ask yourself, what trade-offs are you making in life as a result of the time crunch?" Rob: "One interesting thing about that time crunch is that 11 million bits of information per second is coming at us. We're only capable of processing 5.7 of the 11 million bits of information per second. So what does that mean? Well, the implication is you better have a filter." Rob: "You'd better understand how you're using your time and start to filter and restructure the information coming in (we know the brain is biological and that we have neuroplasticity) because we're wiring what's coming into the brain." Audrey: "This obviously needs to start with parents modeling this for their kids because we're not going to raise kids who have good time design if we haven't figured it out." Rob: "I think what we forget about often is that there are always these three interacting dimensions in life and don't ever forget that the cultural dimension who is creating what they want to get your attention to take your time away to make you trade off your life is creating those kinds of things out there that are purely designed for addiction." Rob: "I look at what has happened over the last 20 years, with this speed of change in the mix and with the tradeoffs that we've made, the inner communication has been the one that's been affected the most...That whole inner world which is the conduit to the higher brain functioning, to you abilities to understand yourself and revise you you are, is the one that's paying the biggest price for the change in culture." Audrey: "It's so unusual today for kids to ever have five minutes where they're inside themselves just thinking, reflecting, and I think it's true with adults too. I think many adults go days, weeks, months without any inner reflection time." Audrey: "My way of getting inside is to write down my thoughts. It gets me to slow down and stop doing that immediate-answer kind of thing. I do think that providing our kids and our families those kinds of opportunities, even if it's just five minutes sitting on the couch quietly together, stops all the craziness." Rob: "The funnel of Choice-Fulness is first 'awareness', second 'ability' and then 'control'. If you don't work on the first part of the funnel, which is increasing your awareness, you're going to pay a price for your abilities because you need awareness. You translate those into how you control the world around you and you fine-tune your skills, what you've learned by uncovering those abilities, into your future." RESOURCES Listen to my interview on the Live Above the Noise podcast.  https://liveabovethenoise.com/podcasts/episode-15-parenting-expert-audrey-monke-social-skills-and-grit/ Find Dr. Reiher on LinkedIn FutureWise Inc. Books by Robert Reiher    Related Posts/Podcasts If you enjoyed this podcast, listen to Episode 45: Social Media Wellness with Ana Hoayoun. Ep. 96: Unplugged &amp; Happy at Camp Why We Need to Unplug to Connect with Our Families

In this episode, I'm chatting with Dr. Rob Reiher, co-host of the <a href="https://liveabovethenoise.com/" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" target="_blank">Live Above the Noise </a>podcast. Dr. Reiher is a developmental and educational psychologist, media expert and author. We discuss the escalating impact of technology, media, and consumerism and the overload on children, families, and society. Dr. Reiher focuses on educating parents on the importance of teaching children to live above the noise and distraction of our world. BIG IDEAS <ul> <li>Dr. Reiher's career began in product development but it soon became clear to him that the corporate world was more interested in profits than psychology.</li> <li>When your work is not congruent with your beliefs, it can cause harm emotionally and physically. We need to live our values.</li> <li>Humans are hard-wired to be distracted and are wired with blind spots.</li> <li>The Inner IQ stands for Inner Integral Qualities – a critical set of inner qualities (such as self-management) that protect and prepare our children for the future.</li> <li>There are 3 IQ categories and each category breaks down into 3 sub-categories: <ul> <li>your child's character <ul> <li>identity, values, and virtues</li> </ul> </li> <li>your child's competence <ul> <li>self-management, meaning, and mastery</li> </ul> </li> <li>your child's communication system <ul> <li>"me-com", "we-com", and "it-com"</li> </ul> </li> </ul> </li> <li>All nine of those dimensions are critical for an individual's wellbeing and provide a framework to be able to see what's missing or breaking down.</li> <li>Integral Qualities are not the same as Intellectual Quotient, which is what is measured in schools.</li> <li>Because schools are they are not equipped to address the negative impact of toxic tech media and consumerism, they often contribute to the problem.</li> <li>It is ultimately up to parents to prepare their kids with these important internal qualities (IQ).</li> <li>It is important we learn to filter, manage and design our time, which can be broken down into 5 different types: <ul> <li>TCB - Taking Care of Business time</li> <li>Toxic Time - when you feel emotional or upset</li> <li>Coping Time - dealing with stress by distraction</li> <li> Enrichment Time</li> <li>Inside Time - self-talk, inner time</li> </ul> </li> <li>Take the time to self-reflect, or use the 5 Step PAUSE: <ul> <li>P - Prepare</li> <li>A - Attune</li> <li>U - Uncover</li> <li>S -  Shift</li> <li>E - Elevate</li> </ul> </li> <li>The way you spend your time directly affects your wellbeing. For children to thrive and have fulfilling lives, we need to help them to live above the noise.</li> </ul> QUOTES Audrey: "I think it's a really important concept to teach kids to be more aware of what they're feeling, how things are impacting them and an ability to see when, for example, something is addicting versus just entertaining." Rob: "We have an infinite appetite for distraction...and its a good thing in some ways. But when it gets manipulated by companies, then you have to make a decision. The combination of an infinite appetite for distraction and over 180 blind spots, creates the background for major trade-offs." Audrey: "It seems like the whole goal is to help parents to understand how they can protect their children and prepare them to live in this world that is an endless stream of distractions." Rob: "If we look at wellbeing as the goal, not happiness, and then if we go underneath wellbeing and we say, what do we know in positive psychology about how wellbeing works, we can create a framework for parents that would give them a way to keep track of the dimensions of wellbeing that may be in jeopardy." Rob: "It's like it is the hardest thing in the world, in this overwhelming society, to say, what do I pay attention to? What is important? There are so many people saying so many things." Rob: "Let's redefine what a smart kid is and understand that from a wellbeing perspective, as opposed to what schools still keep in place as an IQ. Unfortunately, the traditional IQ intelligence quotient that our schools promote does not adequately address the growing negative impact of toxic tech media and consumerism on our children's development. School alone is simply not enough to prepare them for a fulfilling future." Rob: "I'm in love with your camp concept because that's one of the places (where kids can develop the good kind of IQ) being away from home, getting that break from technology." Rob: "Time is our biggest issue now and everybody's really struggling with their time. Ask yourself, what trade-offs are you making in life as a result of the time crunch?" Rob: "One interesting thing about that time crunch is that 11 million bits of information per second is coming at us. We're only capable of processing 5.7 of the 11 million bits of information per second. So what does that mean? Well, the implication is you better have a filter." Rob: "You'd better understand how you're using your time and start to filter and restructure the information coming in (we know the brain is biological and that we have neuroplasticity) because we're wiring what's coming into the brain." Audrey: "This obviously needs to start with parents modeling this for their kids because we're not going to raise kids who have good time design if we haven't figured it out." Rob: "I think what we forget about often is that there are always these three interacting dimensions in life and don't ever forget that the cultural dimension who is creating what they want to get your attention to take your time away to make you trade off your life is creating those kinds of things out there that are purely designed for addiction." Rob: "I look at what has happened over the last 20 years, with this speed of change in the mix and with the tradeoffs that we've made, the inner communication has been the one that's been affected the most...That whole inner world which is the conduit to the higher brain functioning, to you abilities to understand yourself and revise you you are, is the one that's paying the biggest price for the change in culture." Audrey: "It's so unusual today for kids to ever have five minutes where they're inside themselves just thinking, reflecting, and I think it's true with adults too. I think many adults go days, weeks, months without any inner reflection time." Audrey: "My way of getting inside is to write down my thoughts. It gets me to slow down and stop doing that immediate-answer kind of thing. I do think that providing our kids and our families those kinds of opportunities, even if it's just five minutes sitting on the couch quietly together, stops all the craziness." Rob: "The funnel of Choice-Fulness is first 'awareness', second 'ability' and then 'control'. If you don't work on the first part of the funnel, which is increasing your awareness, you're going to pay a price for your abilities because you need awareness. You translate those into how you control the world around you and you fine-tune your skills, what you've learned by uncovering those abilities, into your future." RESOURCES Listen to my interview on the <a href="https://liveabovethenoise.com/" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" target="_blank">Live Above the Noise</a> podcast. <a href="https://liveabovethenoise.com/podcasts/episode-15-parenting-expert-audrey-monke-social-skills-and-grit/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://liveabovethenoise.com/podcasts/episode-15-parenting-expert-audrey-monke-social-skills-and-grit/</a> <a href="https://www.linkedin.com/in/robertreiher/" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" target="_blank">Find Dr. Reiher on LinkedIn</a> <a href="https://iamfuturewise.com/" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" target="_blank">FutureWise Inc.</a> Books by Robert Reiher <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Kidnapped-Irresponsible-Marketers-Stealing-Children/dp/1419505033/ref=as_li_ss_il?keywords=rob+reiher+kidnapped&amp;qid=1567466279&amp;s=gateway&amp;sr=8-1-fkmr0&amp;linkCode=li3&amp;tag=sunshineparen-20&amp;linkId=0c6b6008a0cdecbfb9fd48e1fecbda08&amp;language=en_US" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" target="_blank"></a><a href="https://www.amazon.com/What-Kids-Buy-Psychology-Marketing/dp/0684871173/ref=as_li_ss_il?qid=1567466337&amp;refinements=p_27:Robert+H.+Reiher&amp;s=books&amp;sr=1-1&amp;text=Robert+H.+Reiher&amp;linkCode=li3&amp;tag=sunshineparen-20&amp;linkId=0ba93e00b31438f62f64d9dd97f67cf3&amp;language=en_US" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" target="_blank"></a>   Related Posts/Podcasts If you enjoyed this podcast, listen to <a href="https://sunshine-parenting.com/ep-45-social-media-wellness-with-ana-homayoun/" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" target="_blank">Episode 45: Social Media Wellness with Ana Hoayoun.</a> <a href="https://sunshine-parenting.com/ep-96-unplugged-happy-at-camp/" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" target="_blank">Ep. 96: Unplugged &amp; Happy at Camp</a> <a href="https://sunshine-parenting.com/need-unplug-connect-families/" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" target="_blank">Why We Need to Unplug to Connect with Our Families</a>

Ep. 105: Live Above the Noise with Rob Reiher