Kiley Hanish's guest appearances

Kiley Hanish

The Better Divorce Podcast

Resilient Moms: Hope, Healing &amp; Living After Loss

Amy Sanders

Jennifer Lawrence

Laila Ali

Sarah Clark

Lisa Ann

Rosalind Sedacca

Karen Yankovich

Lora Cheadle

Tracy Malone

Belinda Farrell

Gabrielle Hartley

Lindsey Ellison

Michelle Mitchell

Jason Levoy

Eliza Bacot

OwlTail

Kiley Hanish's husband, a filmmaker, decided to write a fictional script about their son Norbert who was stillborn to help with his healing of grief and to break the silence. They had been very private about their loss for 9 years, people do not talk about the death of a baby and it is very isolating. The release of the film introduced them into the baby loss community where they found there were people just like them. They finally felt like they were not crazy and that their behaviors were not strange. The film validated so many, helped them not feel alone and it was no longer taboo to talk about their losses. From that point forward she sacrificed not feeling comfortable as an introvert for the great good of this new community of people. Kiley started holding retreats with a holistic experience. She talks in this episode about the different components of the retreat that are important to release the layers of grief and trauma that are stored in the body. These retreats are very transformative for the women, as they peel off layers of grief and can be themselves. In a very short period of time Kiley has created a nonprofit organization for bereaved parents, their families and healthcare provides to spread awareness, education and support. Through the organization the focus is to break the silence, nurture healing and inspire hope. There are virtual support groups available for pregnancy and infant loss, termination for medical reasons, women of color, recurrent loss, infertility, pregnancy after loss, fathers, grandparents etc. Also on the website you will find links to webinars, brochures to order or download and print, you can find tips, tools and resources. Knowledge is empowering and you can find a ton of information and resources on the website. https://rtzhope.org/ Film Return to Zero: https://rtzhope.org/return-to-zero-film (this has links to Amazon, YouTube, and iTunes) Connect on Social media: Instagram, Facebook, Twitter @RTZhope Connect with Teresa: EMAIL teresa.womenconnect2019@gmail.com or teresa.livingaftergrief.com Facebook https://www.facebook.com/.womenconnectsupport/. and https://www.facebook.com/.livingaftergrief/. Instagram: @womenconnectandsupport or @livingaftergrief Website: www.livingaftergrief.com click and schedule a time to chat

Kiley Hanish's husband, a filmmaker, decided to write a fictional script about their son Norbert who was stillborn to help with his healing of grief and to break the silence. They had been very private about their loss for 9 years, people do not talk about the death of a baby and it is very isolating. The release of the film introduced them into the baby loss community where they found there were people just like them. They finally felt like they were not crazy and that their behaviors were not strange. The film validated so many, helped them not feel alone and it was no longer taboo to talk about their losses. From that point forward she sacrificed not feeling comfortable as an introvert for the great good of this new community of people. Kiley started holding retreats with a holistic experience. She talks in this episode about the different components of the retreat that are important to release the layers of grief and trauma that are stored in the body. These retreats are very transformative for the women, as they peel off layers of grief and can be themselves. In a very short period of time Kiley has created a nonprofit organization for bereaved parents, their families and healthcare provides to spread awareness, education and support. Through the organization the focus is to break the silence, nurture healing and inspire hope. There are virtual support groups available for pregnancy and infant loss, termination for medical reasons, women of color, recurrent loss, infertility, pregnancy after loss, fathers, grandparents etc. Also on the website you will find links to webinars, brochures to order or download and print, you can find tips, tools and resources. Knowledge is empowering and you can find a ton of information and resources on the website. <a href="https://rtzhope.org/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://rtzhope.org/</a> Film Return to Zero: <a href="https://rtzhope.org/return-to-zero-film" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://rtzhope.org/return-to-zero-film</a> (this has links to Amazon, YouTube, and iTunes) Connect on Social media: Instagram, Facebook, Twitter @RTZhope Connect with Teresa: EMAIL teresa.womenconnect2019@gmail.com or <a href="http://teresa.livingaftergrief.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">teresa.livingaftergrief.com</a> Facebook <a href="https://www.facebook.com/.womenconnectsupport/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://www.facebook.com/.womenconnectsupport/</a>. and <a href="https://www.facebook.com/.womenconnectsupport/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://www.facebook.com/.livingaftergrief/</a>. Instagram: @womenconnectandsupport or @livingaftergrief Website: <a href="http://www.livingaftergrief.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">www.livingaftergrief.com</a> click and schedule a time to chat

62: Return to Zero: H.O.P.E. with Kiley Hanish

Kiley Hanish planned to have a home birth but after not feeling well at 35 weeks and having some bleeding she went to the doctors office to be checked. She was told I can't find the heartbeat. She was by herself and in total shock and she said all I remember saying is "What am I supposed to do" and the doctor said maybe you should cry. Her traumatic experience was intensified due to the care she received. She is sharing her story to help you have a voice and to encourage you to be an advocate for yourself and your baby. ~ She was sent home " It was creepy to walk around with my baby inside knowing he had died." ~ No guidance' I wish I would have been guided to realize that these are my final moments with my baby ~ No guidance in creating memories of my baby. ~ The midwife said, " I didn't feel a soul in the room did you? ~ When they removed my baby from the room it was as if he wasn't even a baby, he was put in a cardboard box. After Kiley talked about the hospital experience with no support she goes on to share some very valuable suggestions on how she is envious of the support and guidance that others have received. And we talked in depth about how to advocate for yourself if you experience a loss. ~ Bath and Dress your baby ~ Keep the baby in the room as long as you want. Have the family come to meet your baby. ~ There is no hurry to say goodbye to your baby. This will be the only time you have with them. ~ Create Memories Kiley gave some great advice also to medical providers to create normalcy for the families. Prepare them by talking about what is going to happen and what the baby will look like. Most people haven't seen someone that has died and especially not a baby. Tell them things that were helpful for other parents and share ways that other families have created memories so they know it's not scary and so that they don't feel crazy. Such as pictures, hand and foot molds and/or prints, and a lock of hair. Encourage the parents to name their baby and again keep the baby in the room as long as they want so others have time to meet the baby. Allow them to take the blanket home that the baby was wrapped in. We also talked about her journey of grief and postpartum PTSD. She shared about how she felt, the symptoms she had and the struggle to get the help she needed. She shared a ton of advice in this area as well. Here is just one of the nuggets she shared, You need to go to someone that knows about baby loss, if you go to someone that hasn't worked with baby loss, it is useless. Kiley's advice: I want you to know you are not alone. It feels very isolating and there are others that have been through it and connect with them. Even if you are an introvert like myself, it is still nice to have those people that you can let your guard down, be vulnerable and honest with. And that there is information out there to help guide you on this path. It's not like you are thrown in the middle of an ocean without a raft. I think knowledge is empowering. There are books, videos etc. out there, seek it out and there are others to help you. https://rtzhope.org Film Return to Zero: https://rtzhope.org/return-to-zero-film (this has links to Amazon, YouTube, and iTunes) Connect with me: EMAIL teresa.womenconnect2019@gmail.com or teresa.livingaftergrief.com Facebook https://www.facebook.com/.womenconnectsupport/. and https://www.facebook.com/.livingaftergrief/. Instagram: @womenconnectandsupport or @livingaftergrief Website: www.livingaftergrief.com click and schedule a time to chat

Kiley Hanish planned to have a home birth but after not feeling well at 35 weeks and having some bleeding she went to the doctors office to be checked. She was told I can't find the heartbeat. She was by herself and in total shock and she said all I remember saying is "What am I supposed to do" and the doctor said maybe you should cry. Her traumatic experience was intensified due to the care she received. She is sharing her story to help you have a voice and to encourage you to be an advocate for yourself and your baby. ~ She was sent home " It was creepy to walk around with my baby inside knowing he had died." ~ No guidance' I wish I would have been guided to realize that these are my final moments with my baby ~ No guidance in creating memories of my baby. ~ The midwife said, " I didn't feel a soul in the room did you? ~ When they removed my baby from the room it was as if he wasn't even a baby, he was put in a cardboard box. After Kiley talked about the hospital experience with no support she goes on to share some very valuable suggestions on how she is envious of the support and guidance that others have received. And we talked in depth about how to advocate for yourself if you experience a loss. ~ Bath and Dress your baby ~ Keep the baby in the room as long as you want. Have the family come to meet your baby. ~ There is no hurry to say goodbye to your baby. This will be the only time you have with them. ~ Create Memories Kiley gave some great advice also to medical providers to create normalcy for the families. Prepare them by talking about what is going to happen and what the baby will look like. Most people haven't seen someone that has died and especially not a baby. Tell them things that were helpful for other parents and share ways that other families have created memories so they know it's not scary and so that they don't feel crazy. Such as pictures, hand and foot molds and/or prints, and a lock of hair. Encourage the parents to name their baby and again keep the baby in the room as long as they want so others have time to meet the baby. Allow them to take the blanket home that the baby was wrapped in. We also talked about her journey of grief and postpartum PTSD. She shared about how she felt, the symptoms she had and the struggle to get the help she needed. She shared a ton of advice in this area as well. Here is just one of the nuggets she shared, You need to go to someone that knows about baby loss, if you go to someone that hasn't worked with baby loss, it is useless. Kiley's advice: I want you to know you are not alone. It feels very isolating and there are others that have been through it and connect with them. Even if you are an introvert like myself, it is still nice to have those people that you can let your guard down, be vulnerable and honest with. And that there is information out there to help guide you on this path. It's not like you are thrown in the middle of an ocean without a raft. I think knowledge is empowering. There are books, videos etc. out there, seek it out and there are others to help you. https://<a href="https://rtzhope.org/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">rtzhope.org</a> Film Return to Zero: <a href="https://rtzhope.org/return-to-zero-film" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://rtzhope.org/return-to-zero-film</a> (this has links to Amazon, YouTube, and iTunes) Connect with me: EMAIL teresa.womenconnect2019@gmail.com or <a href="http://teresa.livingaftergrief.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">teresa.livingaftergrief.com</a> Facebook <a href="https://www.facebook.com/.womenconnectsupport/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://www.facebook.com/.womenconnectsupport/</a>. and <a href="https://www.facebook.com/.womenconnectsupport/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://www.facebook.com/.livingaftergrief/</a>. Instagram: @womenconnectandsupport or @livingaftergrief Website: <a href="http://www.livingaftergrief.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">www.livingaftergrief.com</a> click and schedule a time to chat

61: Baby Loss Intensified: Advocate for yourself with Kiley Hanish

MD Kiley Hanish is an Occupational therapist who specializes in pregnancy and infant loss.  Grief and trauma need to be experienced. And we all must understand that everyone experiences them differently.   The MOVIE Return to Zero was created in honor of their son Norbert.  HOPE: The Foundation was created  Healing Retreat Outreach and education Peer support and community Empowerment  What should women expect when they attend one of your retreats?  15-20 women come to feel validated and feel heard, to be supported and to process their feelings and grief.  Yoga, Niia, Talk group circles, Cognitive work, Crafts, Bodywork, Free time, Downtime, time in nature and time to rest.  All of the women are scared and nervous at first and leave feeling loved and respected for their experience.  There is no time limit on processing grief. Anywhere from 2-3 weeks to 35 years! Pregnancy and infant loss is a traumatic PTSD experience that doctors and hospitals are not prepared to handle properly.  Doctors are unprepared for stillbirth! It truly breaks my heart to know how unprepared they are.  Calling to tell the story: Isolated and alone, Felt validated, Felt safe Bring them together and nurture them.  I realized that time doesn't heal if you aren't going to work on it. It brought me to my knees. I could now relate to other people who had gone through the same It wasn’t my job to heal them it was my job to hold the space. Learned to feel my feelings and not push them away. It allowed me to cry and mope around and just feel. Gave me permission to be with myself where I was at the moment. Honoring this in myself. It is not going to go away. There will be times now I still feel the pain.  Allowing the idea of integration of the experience. Conflict of what we are going through to the outside. Versus what’s going on on the inside. "I’m fine" attitude! Safe space is created to reconnect to themselves. I am transformed into this new fully developed human. I embrace all parts of myself. I choose to be vulnerable.   Kiley kept her own Divorce private and put on a brave mask.  With does grief look like and feel like?  The reason she created HOPE is from her own transformational growth after infant loss. Expanding to a wider community allows a safe place for the unraveling to unfold. Trying to rebuild yourself all in a setting and power of community.  How can we create communities where people help people?  I see the future of training health professionals.  Helping men become vulnerable too!  Life is really hard. We all need help.  Being able to accept the full picture of life is complex. We don’t have to be defined by our pain and experience. It wasn’t until I actively participated in our own growth that we heal. We all need a guide. We all need someone to walk with you through your pain. I believe Kiley is that spiritual guide.  Kiley's next retreat is in April in Northern CA You can reach out to Kiley anytime!!  RTZ.hope.org  ---   Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/thebetterdivorcepodcast/message

MD Kiley Hanish is an Occupational therapist who specializes in pregnancy and infant loss.  Grief and trauma need to be experienced. And we all must understand that everyone experiences them differently.  The MOVIE Return to Zero was created in honor of their son Norbert.  HOPE: The Foundation was created  Healing Retreat Outreach and education Peer support and community Empowerment What should women expect when they attend one of your retreats?  15-20 women come to feel validated and feel heard, to be supported and to process their feelings and grief.  Yoga, Niia, Talk group circles, Cognitive work, Crafts, Bodywork, Free time, Downtime, time in nature and time to rest.  All of the women are scared and nervous at first and leave feeling loved and respected for their experience.  There is no time limit on processing grief. Anywhere from 2-3 weeks to 35 years! Pregnancy and infant loss is a traumatic PTSD experience that doctors and hospitals are not prepared to handle properly.  Doctors are unprepared for stillbirth! It truly breaks my heart to know how unprepared they are.  Calling to tell the story: Isolated and alone, Felt validated, Felt safe Bring them together and nurture them. I realized that time doesn't heal if you aren't going to work on it. It brought me to my knees. I could now relate to other people who had gone through the same It wasn’t my job to heal them it was my job to hold the space. Learned to feel my feelings and not push them away. It allowed me to cry and mope around and just feel. Gave me permission to be with myself where I was at the moment. Honoring this in myself. It is not going to go away. There will be times now I still feel the pain.  Allowing the idea of integration of the experience. Conflict of what we are going through to the outside. Versus what’s going on on the inside. "I’m fine" attitude! Safe space is created to reconnect to themselves. I am transformed into this new fully developed human. I embrace all parts of myself. I choose to be vulnerable. Kiley kept her own Divorce private and put on a brave mask.  With does grief look like and feel like?  The reason she created HOPE is from her own transformational growth after infant loss. Expanding to a wider community allows a safe place for the unraveling to unfold. Trying to rebuild yourself all in a setting and power of community.  How can we create communities where people help people?  I see the future of training health professionals.  Helping men become vulnerable too! Life is really hard. We all need help.  Being able to accept the full picture of life is complex. We don’t have to be defined by our pain and experience. It wasn’t until I actively participated in our own growth that we heal. We all need a guide. We all need someone to walk with you through your pain. I believe Kiley is that spiritual guide. Kiley's next retreat is in April in Northern CA You can reach out to Kiley anytime!!  <a href="http://rtz.hope.org/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">RTZ.hope.org</a> --- Send in a voice message: <a href="https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/thebetterdivorcepodcast/message" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/thebetterdivorcepodcast/message</a>